Corrupt-A-Wish

Granted, but as the years go on, the sun gets bigger. And you'll live in extreme heat, until the sun eventually eats the Earth. And when that happens you'll be trapped in the sun forever!

I wish I knew what people are thinking
 
Granted! They are entitled, respectively, the Tome of Eternal Suffering and the Old Intestine Farmer’s Almanac of 1367. The images are disturbing.

I wish for a rock.
 
Granted. You now have ownership over an action figurine of Dwane "The Rock" Johnson.

I wish for garum!
 
Granted, but the store didn't have any, so you just got tomato sauce instead

I wish for a pet cow
 
Granted, but it is way battered and damaged beyond repair. No more antique museum-quality items to sell!

I wish for a Godzilla
 
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I wish I had a unicorn called @Aerilia as my pet.
 
Granted, but the bar is so hard that it's impossible to eat it without breaking your teeth.

After having tried to eat Skaraborg's chocolate bar, I wish for a dentist.
 
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Granted, but something happened to your wish in which it became corrupted.

I wish for a dictionary
 
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