OPBlogsenal

Some days I wonder if I'll ever really know you. Have we met before?

Good imagery, though. I like it. The tone was interesting. Hooray for new nieces. I don't have any yet. But I have about a brazillion cousins and second cousins, and cousins twice removed, and counsins in law, and people who pretend to be my cousins, and cousins boyfriends, and cousin is a really weird looking word if you type it enough.

And hey, if you ever have a problem feeling important, you should know that this blog is the only reason I come around here at all.
 
Last night, I was reclining on my back porch, soaking in the wonderful starlight when I had a vision. Suddenly, twin vortexes opened up in the night sky, ripping the tranquility open as if it was a sort of bejewelled fabric. These swirling, hellish maelstroms opened, and revealed two gold-ringed eyes, reptilian in nature. I sat transfixed, as if caught in the gaze of a basilisk. From nowhere and yet everywhere, a voice filled my head, driving out all other thoughts. I shall never forget what this Dietious Being said unto me: BEHOLD, I HAVE CHOSEN YOU TO COMPLETE MY WORK. YOU SHALL SIRE MY ONLY CHILD, THE ONE THAT RESTORES ORDER UPON THE EARTH. THEN YOU SHALL ASSUME YOUR MANTLE AS THE RIGHT AND TRUE LEADER.

It is not my place to ask why, only to know that his words will come true, for all I have to do is believe, and keep my faith in things that are, to you, unseen He shared a great many truths with me, then he descended back to the firey realm from whence he was begotten. Thanks and honor, amen.

No World Cup stuff of any consequence. How disappionted I am indeed.

I had a great Father's Day. I like my dad a great deal. And today is my mother's birthday. Yippee. Festival time.

I'm done for now, I think. Economics sucks out my will to blog.

Nothing will ever make things right.

(CW)OP out.
 
Yesterday, I recieved my helper, my advocate. He appeared from nowhere, he just suddenly WAS. We talked for a short while, me in English, he is some hellish bastard mixture of Cyrillic, Gaelic and Japanese. His name is Barbaross and he is ultimately responsible for making sure I accomplish what I am to achieve for his -nay- OUR Master. Anything I need, he obtains, anything he procures I put to nefarious use. His countenance is unholy, a union of the worst possible features. His hind legs are that of a goat and are covered in mangy, matted fur with a smattering of open sores. He walks upright like a man and uses the tail of a lion much like a cow uses its tail: to disperse the ever-present surrounding cloud of gnats and biting flies. He has the torso of a chimpanzee with matching arms. Atop his shoulders sits the head of a Donkey with the fangs and tongue of a serpent. Feline eyes are set into the head and dried feces are caked upon his strangely uncloven hooves. His thirst is for blood and his hunger for childflesh.

Arsenal released a strangely blurry photo of the new home kit here (clicky!). Thank heaven for red and white. I watched Ukraine demolish whoever they were playing yesterday. In related news, Cesc sacked up huge for Spain. He is a great footballer, and I'm proud to have him at Arsenal, at least until Chelsea decide they need him more than we do.

Why haven't we got rid of Campbell yet?

Slow day, nothing much to blog about. Thanks for the audience. You are nothing, I am everything.

In the sincerest hopes.

(CW)OP out.
 
It is my sincerest pleasure. Nothing borderline satanic today, just average crap. Like every other day. I might have a new job as an assistant manager at Claire's. You know the store. They sell pink things and fake jewlery to preteen girls. And they pay well, too.

More later, if I can be arsed.

How long must I wait?

(CW)OP out.
 
Thanks for everything, to everyone. If you think you need it.

Last night I watched one of the greatest football matches ever. Hideous Step-Overy Cunt (clicky!) got injured, and Robin van Persie gets to spend a nice long summer break getting ready for the new Arsenal season (clicky!) in the new Arsenal stadium,(clicky!) with the new Arsenal shirt. (clicky!) Fuck yes.

It looks like today's blog is a new edition of When Links Attack.

I'm patiently waiting for Penny Arcade!(clicky!) to update... Seriously, fellas. Let's get on the ball. When I had a webcomic it was updated religiously.

You want it, I've got it.

Congratulations to Pierconium and Gracius Maximus. You both made me realize that I have a long way to go until my ego develops into the righteous diety it once was.

I got a B in my Economics class that I was taking in the first summer term. Hooray for me, and I'm now taking Macroeconomics. Here's to a good grade in that course, too.

If Daimiaena is reading this, which post shocked you the most? Just a little curiosity from me.

Gremlins provide gremlinium indeed.

(CW)OP out.
 
Short blog today.

I have to go to class shortly for ANOTHER economics course. I'm a masochist, what can I say?

What mo' can I say to ya?[/H.-to-the-O.V.]

I have a job interview today. Hopefully, if it all goes well, I'll be working at Starbucks. Hate me all you want, I need a damn job.

I love you almost as much as I love me.

(CW)OP out.
 
I don't see why people hate Starbucks, the make good coffee, treat their employees really well, and participate in fair trade. Reminds me of a discussion I had with someone a bit ago. "I work for the man, but the man has a 401k plan"

Basically good luck and i've heard a lot of good things about being a barista at starbucks. Or whatever else you may be doing there.
 
I had hoped you read that. Not only for the Starbucks thing, but for the Jay-Z reference. If you work 20+ hours per week you get full health and dental coverage. Very interesting.

A bit of Penny Arcade!(clicky!) art for you.

pax06_cover.jpg
 
Ugh, Claire's. Main supplier of useless crap. Oh. they also supply those sex bracelets (which have a more obscene name) some girls wear. You know, the ones where the different colors mean different things and if you rip one off their arm you do the act together? Yeah. :ph34r:
 
Accusations of law-breaking notwithstanding, I bring to you today's blog, posted from an underground bunker that is 500% radiation and fallout proof.

The Russians are coming. So are the French.

Welcome home, Fibonacci. I wonder what it will take to get him to come back permanently. Maybe we'll reopen the Official G.R.O.S.S. Clubhouse.

Test today in Macroeconomics. Taking these courses has really been interesting. I've learned that 90-99% of what politicians say about stimulating the economy is bullshit. The economy goes up and down at will, and nobody really knows why it happens. It could be because people buy shit. But why do they buy the things that they do? How do they cope with limited resources? It's really just a Great Crapshoot®.

I am scared of grasshoppers. I have this phobia for them that perplexes me. I do know the root of the phobia, though. When I was small, I was going fishing with my dad. We walked through a field of tall grass, and I got a huge thrill out of the fact that only my head stuck out over the top of the grass. When we got to the lake, I walked out of the field, looked down, and I was fucking covered in the infernal creatures. Ever since, no thanks on the grasshoppers.

You shall never achieve.

(CW)OP out.
 
Just one of the many services I provide.

Glad to know that at least one member has the sentience to appreciate my work.
 
I shall never give in to the demands of the lesser among us until I collapse, and I am no more.

In celebrity news, Keith Richards WILL be in Pirates of the Carribean 3. Fuck yes. I can't wait to go see Dead Man's Chest and get my Dose O' Depp.

There is a God. He exists, and I praise Him with all my mortal being can give. Thanks are due, thanks are given, and I devote my existence to Him, in this life and the next.

The Italy/Germany match was well enough, and I apologize to Flemingovia for deriding his Italy man-crush. Sad for Jens but on the balance of it the Italians deserved to go through and in Fabio Cannavaro they have the best center-half in the world right now. He was just awesome all night long like he has been since the first game. If Juventus go down, as looks likely, I hope Arsenal's interest isn’t confined to Buffon and we think very strongly about bringing him in as well. No doubt he’d have his choice of clubs all over the world but the idea of Kolo, Phil and Djourou learning from him for a couple of seasons is mouthwatering.

My Independence Day was nice and uneventful. Yard work, grilled meats, swimming in the pool, a bit of beer and World Cup soccer. Plus, I still have all my extremities and I was uninjured in the annual Arson Jubilee(tm).

You are in the wrong.

(CW)OP out.
 
Where could she be? Tonight I'm cooking dinner. I have no idea what to make. Maybe some chicken. Or fish. Salmon. Mmmmmm...

So I'm thinking of starting a fantasy football (American) league on Yahoo Sports. If I did, would you sign up for it?

I've got a puppet in The Lexicon. Shhh... You can visit it by clicking here.

Soory there's not much of a blog. I've a funeral to go to soon, and I really don't feel like writing.

The youngest was the most loved.

(CW)OP out.
 
I'm mailing it in today, as far as the first bit is concerned. I really don't have enough time to do a proper blog before class, so I'll re-post an e-mail that I got from my friend Lara. We met in Taos, NM two years ago at a Blue Moon Festival and were soon inseperable. She was my best friend while I was out there, and she's really great, etc. Here's the e-mail, none of which I am makling up or embellishing.

Lara's e-mail:
Hi beautiful friend and family!

Michael and I just returned from our marvelous two week
vacation. It all started with our one year anniversary at Amma's
(the hugging saint from India- amma.org) in Los Angeles followed by
an amazing outdoor String Cheese Incident and Ratdog (Grateful Dead
music) show.
Then we went to San Diego and saw another great Cheese/Ratdog
show. That night we stayed with another Amma fan who lives 5
minutes from the ocean! So the next day we swam in the ocean. It
was LOTS of fun! :)
The next day we went to Sedona, Arizona. It was SO beautiful!
We hiked around and meditated on the red rocks. I could really feel
the spiritual energy that exists in that place. I have never been so
into sitting down and meditating in my life, but something about
being there really compelled me to experience the land that way. It
was amazing. :)
Then we went to Pheonix for another fun Cheese/Ratdog show and
then to Flagstaff for a beautiful Cheese show where we got to dance
in the grass and hoola hoop to the music. :)
Then we went to Taos, New Mexico where I showed Michael the
hidden kiva (underground sacred prayer chamber built by Taos Puelbo
Native Americans) in the woods, Rita's (where they have the BEST
chili rellenos ever!), the gorge, the earthship neighborhood, Three
Peaks (where I got to see my friend Aaron again), etc. :)
Then we went to Colorado Springs to visit my friends Liz and Dan
and see their two babies! :) Yay! Their kids are SOoooo cute! :)
Then we went to the Rainbow Gathering in Routt National Forest,
Colorado (just outside Steamboat Springs).
It was AMAZING! Everyone at the gathering was so friendly and
sweet and loving! We set up our tent at Yoga camp near a stream.
Every day we woke up and went to a fun kundalini yoga class or
creative movement class. Then we would go to main circle and have a
main meal with everyone. It was kinda like camp. Everyone would
gather and would have their own bowls and silverware. When a lot of
people were there, everyone would circle up. We would all hold
hands and ohm together and sit down. People would come around a
serve food (all vegetarian yummy stuff). :) People would walk
around making announcements about events that were happening around
the gathering (talent shows, pizza night at Loving Oven kitchen,
etc). Other people would walk around and make practical
announcements about where to get drinking water, etc.
After the main meal people would start drumming, dancing, and/or
singing. One time after the meal there was an angel walk- this is
where you close your eyes and walk down a line with people on either
side of you. As you pass by the people, they tell you wonderful
things about you (i.e. "You are a beautiful person, your smile makes
us all so happy, you give so much to this world, etc"). I spent a
LONG time being one of the people who gets to tell people great
things about them. Then I got to go through the walk myself. It
made me so happy I felt like I was going to explode with joy! I was
nearly crying. It was one of the most amazing experiences I've ever
had.
Another time after main meal there was a cuddle puddle. Another
time there was fire dancing. :)
Then Michael and I would spend the rest of the night until
sunrise walking around the woods, finding kitchens serving pizza or
homemade doughnuts or soup, singing songs around campfires,
listening to people sing and play guitar, flute, xylophone, etc
around a fire.
And everything at the Gathering is FREE! :)
On July 4th everyone woke up early (like around 10 or 11am) and
was silent. We all gathered at main cirlce and formed a circle.
Michael and I walked around blessing people with sage. At around
12noon children paraded into the circle. I blew bubbles. We all
ohmed. Then we all whooped for joy and the drums started. I have
never been to a drum cirlce that big that lasted that long. A bunch
of us had a naked parade and danced around naked for a while. Some
peopel wore body paint. Other people wore crazy costumes. Everyone
was so colorful and happy. It was SO much fun! :)
After the Gathering a lot of us went to Steamboat Springs to see
a free Michael Franti show. It was one of the most amazing concerts
I've ever been to. There was a sunset and a rainbow at the same
time! We all formed a circle and ohmed after the concert. Then we
had the biggest hug I've ever been apart of. Michael and I think
there was about 150-200 people hugging at once (we formed a circle
with an 8 person radius)! :) It was amazing!
On the way home we saw Bryce Canyon. Then we went for a moonlit
walk around the north part of the Grand Canyon. Now we are home and
relaxing.

Love to you all!

Lara :)
Click to expand...
 
I love it when I can recycle my work.

Mailing it in today.

I've been waiting for it for a good while now, and we all knew it was going to happen some day, but I don't think any of us were quite ready for the return of Insane Power and Cathyy. All of us knew it was coming, and let's not kid ourselves... We all knew that when it happened, it would happen just like it did before: we'd get the tasteless humor, the bad jokes, the feigned injured pride... My favorite has got to be the indignance. It happens every time. They cross the line, someone calls them on it, they act like we're selling children to old men for their pleasure.

I really like the tasteless joking, as well. Not to reset old takes or anything, but let's think about this: what's funnier than insulting someone's job and economic status, then saying you're going to find where they live? Seriously, I'm cracking my self up right now! Ahhh-hahahahahahahaha! What's funnier than welfare smack? Yeah, pretty much everything.

All that, and now this: Insane Power has a puppet inside our region, who is quite active and well-known to us all. One day he's going to reveal to us who that puppet is and we should "prepare for heart attacks." I, for one, seriously can't wait to find out who it is. I'm actively trying to find out by doing research into old posts and comparing writing styles, ERRRRR- I don't care. "Prepare for heart attacks." Or prepare for apathy. Whichever.

-Good night now!

(CW)OP out.
 
Real blog post now.

Macroeconomics is boring. Good Christ. And it takes a LOT to bore lil' ole me.

I feel it slipping away. I know it's gonna happen someday( thanks, Moz), but I don't want to be the first. As far as I can tell, I'm creating a type of hell for somebody (kinda thanks, Wayne). I'm discorporeal and tangibility is needed. Sorry. I feel like an anchor of sorts. Head says one thing, heart says another. For now, though, heart > head, because that's the kinda guy I am.

That's the hard part. The easy part = everything else. Except fucking Macro.

A regional war is on. Allegedly. I think this is the answer to that old question about nobody showing up for a war.

I don't know what to do and it's killing me. Questions for advice would be derided by "I told you so" and so I don't. What's going on? Is this the end?

All I gotta do is close my eyes and it all goes away...

(CW)OP out.
 
Sometimes people create hells for themselves, and include you whether or not you had any real impact on it at all. Somedays people just question things, and wonder because they can't do anything more than they are doing, except stop listening to that nagging voice. You'd think I could remember that, when I wrote about it oh-so-long ago...

me:
It gets so frustrating, and like you said, tiring. You get to the point where you don't want to care anymore, because the caring hurts so much. You don't want to keep trying, you don't want to be around anyone because you love everyone you meet, and it's the love that hurts, it's the love that scares and fascinates you. You loathe and need it so much that it becomes this all-consuming part of your life. My loves become my obsessions. And my obsessions are never a good thing. But in the end, there will come that good thing. There will come the guy who loves you no matter what, and who loves you so much it's overwhelming, and you can't be in control...and then you will see if you are ready. You learn if all of this hurt and control that you've gone through, which is so much a part of your life, so habitual to you, is something that you are willing to give up for happiness.

It was so hard for me. I love my wounded places. I write my wounded places...if I didn't have them, I feel like I couldn't find anything to write about, and writing to me is so much a part of who and what I am that I can't not write, and so I can't not be hurting all the time.

But I am learning that things are different. That you can be happy and still be creative and funny and a deep, thinking person. It's the controlling that is so hard to give up, you don't like being controlled by anything, unless it's your feelings. Because we love to feel. People like us love to feel more than anything else. We always need some drama in our life, and so as much as we hate it, we ride these emotional roller coasters until we throw up, and then we get off, and ride them again.

Don't worry too much. Enjoy what you have, and the kind of happiness it brings. It's the overanalyzing, it's the always questioning and evaluating that will make you so depressed. At least, that's how it is for me.

I wind up getting offended and hurt over things that people haven't even done...over things that I've concluded about some little stupid comment, that turn into this huge spiral of "Oh god, he really hates me, he doesn't mean that, he can't be sincere...I don't love me, how could anyone else? If he says he loves me, he's just lying to me, and if he's lying about that, then he's probably lying about everything, and I can't trust him and oh my whole world is going to fall apart and now I have to go write pages and pages and pages in my journal and stay up all night crying..."

...And then when he senses something isn't right, he asks you what's wrong, and you say "Nothing," choking over it through your tears, and he hears the hurt and the tears and aches so much to make you whole, to have you feel better, but you don't let him, because you doubt him so much, you don't want to doubt him but you do, you can't help it.

"And then this doubt, this mistrust will consume every part of the relationship until it overwhelms the both of you, and everything just falls apart, it crumbles to dust, and then you sit in the ashes and the broken pieces and you cry, you cry because you're so mad at yourself, and you want to just be mad at him and blame him, but you can't because you know that it's you. It's always you in the end.

"And that is a hard and bitter thing. You have to learn, and this is the hard part, you have to learn to not listen to the nagging, doubting voice. You have to learn to be unassuming, and to push the doubt out of you when it comes, and shine a light on it, and say "You are the thing that does this, you are the thing that I should be learning to control."
Click to expand...

Sometimes I'm brilliant, I just have a really hard time taking my own damn advice. <_<
 
Feeling better today, but I had to wake up at 4 goddamn am to be at work at 5 goddamn am. But I've now got my Pandora station up and running. And I couldn't be happier. Flaming Lips knock-offs. Inspired by Wayne, et al.

You should try it out.

Click here.

I love her so much it hurts.

(CW)OP out.
 
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