Corrupt A Wish

Namye is back spamming .. that being the meat spam and suddenly you can't get out of your house because namye spammed you in and you starve to death after living off mice for months


I wish my anti wishes were a little less morbid
 
you have no money ... so the government steps in an forces you to have everything .. you live to excess for a week until your underfunded body can't handle anymore and your heart implodes


I wish I didn't think of stuff like that ^
 
I am sober .. so I order a drink .. unfortunately the bar tender slips and drops it on the floor shortly before you walk in .. slip over on the spilt drink and fall through a glass window leaving you bleeding to death

I wish I knew where my need for that stuff comes from!
 
It is for a time, until some kid wrecks it because he can.

I wish the Lemonheads would put out another album.
 
They do, but its only so so. The industry is shocked, companies fall, stock markets collapse. When asked what made them do it, they reply "Sirixis made us do it".

*enter enraged mob with pitchforks stage left*

I wish I ruled an intergalactic empire.
 
You do, but that empire's about the size of Rhode Island and is easily taken by a group of aliens from Mars in a record 27 minutes.

I wish I wouldn't get phone calls at 3am by neurotic people who constantly feel bored and need to yap
 
You rule a pan-galatic empire the likes of which the universe has never known. The dread Ewok Empire.

I wish someone would make me breakfast.
 
I do, but it's gruel, a la Oliver Twist.


I wish I wouldn't get phone calls at 3am by neurotic people who constantly feel bored and need to yap
 
You don't! You get called regularly at 3 am by schizophrenic people who are lonely and want you to talk them out of committing suicide.

I wish I had a banjo
 
Poof! Here you go, a shiny new banjo. You practice diligently and become the most famous banjo player in the history of the world. In other words, less famous than you are now. You eat a finger pick in frustration and die.

I wish I was a little less superficial.
 
Fedele:
You don't! You get called regularly at 3 am by schizophrenic people who are lonely and want you to talk them out of committing suicide.
Click to expand...
You have no idea how close you are to being right as to what happens with me

You are but the superficialness is replaced by self loathing.

I wish I had an endless supply of pens with working ink
 
You do, but all the pens explode in the world, resulting in a bic stock market crash, resulting in a world-wide stock market crash, resulting in you commiting suicide.

*Sajlamot wishes he didnt spam so much...
 
You don't.....but now you just walk around aimlessly because you suddenly feel incomplete and can't explain why.

I wish I could have a ham and eggs breakfast
 
You can, but it will cost you *little finger to mouth* one hundred billion dollars!

I wish I had an evil lair. Of death!
 
He does, but the second he starts to tell you, a big rig drives by honking his horn

I wish I had a big screen tv
 
You get one, but then it falls on your head, smashing the screen and giving you a cuncussion.

I wish there was world peace.
 
There is, but it gets so boring that DD launches a nuclear weapon to break up the monotony.

I wish I could have a bigger apartment.
 
ka pow

Your apartment is so big you feel lost and lonely and you can't afford to heat the whole place.

I wish I could sleep better.
 
You do, but you end up staying asleep til you're 85 and too old to give a damn.

I wish I never bought that Pepsi this morning
 
You sleep, a lot. You get fat and start to smell. Soon your family disown you and you're appearing on Jerry Springer as they attempt to remove you from your bed with a crane.

I wish I had more time for Spam.
 
You do, but you end up eating so much of it that you have a massive heart attack.

I wish I didn't have to class today.
 
You don't have to class, instead you have to work. As a bin-man. In North Korea.

I wish I could switch my brain back on.
 
You do, but you suddenly start acting like a donkey (HEE HAW!)

I wish I didn't make an ass of myself just then
 
You didn't, you infact made an ass out of your significant other. They arrest you for animal cruelty.

I wish that answer didn't suck quite so much.
 
It doesn't, instead it plays over and over your head until you have a mental breakdown. The next we hear from ya, you're in a mental institution because you saw Count Chocula.

I wish I could travel the world
 
You do, as a drugs runner. Eventually you are caught in Vietnam and put into the seediest prison possible.

I wish I could find a nice new jacket!
 
You do, but its Puckton's and full of drugs. A fact you only discover at the Vietnamese Customs Desk. Your put into the seediest prison possible.

I wish I knew where all this spam came from...
 
You do, but it disgusts you so much that you go to the woods and mysteriously never return

I wish I wouldn't be bored
 
You aren't because you are far to busy. The stress makes your head explode, all over the neighbours kids.

I wish it wasn't so cold.
 
You do, but you can't find it. Life becomes a miserable hunt for the unattainable.

I wish I knew a little less and smiled a little more...
 
You smile whilst walking into walls and falling down potholes: dumbarse :P


I wish that Nam wasn't so umm.. hatty.
 
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