Ever Increasing Better-Thans

[Virtual Boy]

My thread is better than yours because it's new

 

[IndieGirl]

My shirt is better than your thread because it has Yoda on it.

 

[Virtual Boy]

My cup is better than your shirt with Yoda on it because it's yellow

 

[IndieGirl]

My headphones are better than your yellow cup because they came with a lifetime warranty AND they're playing Queen at the moment.

 

[Virtual Boy]

My TV is better than your lifetime warranty Queen-o-phones because it's TV, duh

 

[IndieGirl]

My job is better than your TV because I get paid to sit in front of a computer every day.

 

[Virtual Boy]

My phone is better than your job where you get paid for being lazy because it has an asterisk key

 

[IndieGirl]

My phone is better than your phone because it plays "Play That Funky Music" by Wild Cherry every time I get a phone call.

 

[Virtual Boy]

My miniature pitta bread is better than your phone because it's edible

 

[IndieGirl]

My avatar is better than your pita bread because it's a cheerleading mob boss.

 

[Virtual Boy]

My avatar is better than your avatar because it's the cover of one of The Cure's best singles

 

[IndieGirl]

My jalapeno kettle chips are better than your avatar because they taste like burning.

 

[Virtual Boy]

My cuddly gorilla toy, Padraig, is better than your weird food because it's Irish.

 

[IndieGirl]

My stuffed tiger, Richard Parker is better than your gorilla toy because he doubles as a pillow and scares my dog. He's also way better than real fur when it comes to fashion accessories.

 

[Virtual Boy]

My slippers are better than Richard Parker because they're blue and fwuffly-fwuffly.

 

[IndieGirl]

This commercial is better than anything. Even your slippers.

http://adage.com/news.cms?newsId=47342

 

[Virtual Boy]

Aardvarks are better than Genghis Khan Coke ads because they're so fnugging unbelievable.

 

[IndieGirl]

Peter Frampton is better than aardvarks, because he's Peter Frampton.

 

[Virtual Boy]

Monster Magnet is better than Peter Frampton because they attract monsters to one side and nice people to the other.

 

[IndieGirl]

Katamari Damacy is better than Monster Magnet because the King is the best copyrighted shroom-dream this side of The Muppets.

 

[Virtual Boy]

Umblowp the Magical Engine is better than Kalahari Damacy cos he is an urban ledgehend.

 

[IndieGirl]

Sydia is better than Umblowp the Magical Engine because he was funnier. And less drug-addled. I think.

 

[Virtual Boy]

Have you noticed how we're the only two posters in this topic? Irish people are better than Sydia because they have leprechauns living in their houses and their grass is apparently a lot greener than everywhere else. Sorry Sydia.

 

[Sajlamot]

I am better then anyone but you 2 because I'm the first one other then you two to post here.

 

[Virtual Boy]

My spaghetti is better than you because I can store it until July.

 

[Sajlamot]

My avatar is better than yours cause it is funnier.

 

[Virtual Boy]

My avatar is better than yours because it's from Arrested Development, and I don't really understand what yours is.

 

[IndieGirl]

My ninja turtles beanie is better than your avatar, because it's a ninja turtles beanie, duh.

 

[Virtual Boy]

Um.. IG gets round one. Nothing can beat a ninja turtles beanie hat.

Round 2!

My room key beats whatever the heck you have because it's "very silver".

 

[IndieGirl]

My hoodie beats your room key because it has thumb-holes in the sleeves.

 

[Virtual Boy]

My air freshener beats your hoodie because it's fresh and that makes everything allllllllll goooood.

 

[IndieGirl]

My new outfit beats your air freshener...because of the glasses:

 

[Puckton]

My new outfit is better than your new outfit because I have cargo pants with 'em

 

[IndieGirl]

Big Wally is better than your cargo pants.

This is Big Wally:

 

[Virtual Boy]

My Rich Tea biscuits beat Big Wally because unlike Man-Spam they're edible.

 

[IndieGirl]

My yeller stripey tiger pants beat your Rich Tea Biscuits because they're wearable.

 

[Virtual Boy]

My boxset of Firefly on DVD is better than yer yeller pants cos it's watchable.

 

[IndieGirl]

I think you win. I want a Firefly box set.

 

[Kumiko]

My truck's cd player beats that DVD box set of Firefly.

Yes, it's that good.

 

[Flemingovia]

My car's CD beats your truck's CD because it is the only thing on my Car that works.