Embassy of The United Defenders League

FINALLY, the conclusion to last update’s survey challenge: The Right to Life Army (RTLA) was voted as the worst raider organization of the past few months (by 21 votes), followed by Awesomespaceland (14 votes) and The Defender Alliance (12 votes).
Oddly enough, Awesomespaceland and TDA are no longer functioning groups, and I debate the merits of calling TDA "raider" as they attempted to attack and antagonize raiders in general prior to their destruction at the hands of Lone Wolves United operatives. This would make them Fenda, by definition, not Crasher.
I think hypocrite is more appropriate.. Depends more on perspective and how the R/D game is viewed as a whole, though.
As a God I detected the intent in the heart of a poster who was just about to post something insulting about UDL. Becuase of my speaking from on high, he was dissuaded from this course of action and did not post.

The fact that they did not post is proof of my divinity.

Wait until you see the phallic totem I am having made for the regional idol. Only problem is I have to stay absolutely still for six hours while the plaster of Paris dries.


A Letter from the Capitalis de Societate of The United Defenders League,

Our eyes and our hearts are have been possessed by Belgium; in the past week, we saw a large foreign hindrance to that community develop internally. Raiders seized the region in large numbers. We have felt the struggles and the frustration of the Belgians. We had thought of strategy, we dreamt of resolution.

I had written this great speech to go here because when I had written it, Belgium was still occupied and we were preparing for a liberation in a week’s time. As of late night, the Belgium occupation was over; raiders used a cliché technique to take the Rejected Realms briefly for twelve hours before being overwhelmed by forces from TITO, UDL, RRA and the FRA. Nonetheless, I’ll keep the speech lying around since it will apply to us again in the near future, if it be a week from now, or two weeks. This is the time to recruit, this is the time to learn and prepare. Charles Darwin said that "it is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change."

*excuse me* >_>

1 minute ago: Unibot II was commended by Security Council Resolution # 78.

The commendation is indeed a great honor. I’ve had the opportunity to commend some amazing players like The Cat-Tribe and Commerce Heights and have had the opportunity to get know some other amazing players like A Mean Old Man, Ballotonia, Goobergunchia, Kandarin, Naivetry and Todd McCloud who are all in the commendation “clubbie”. I wouldn’t have written the commendations I have if I didn’t think it was one of the biggest honours that the NationStates community could bestow on a player. So, this is a really pleasant surprise; thank you.

On the subject of our administration, this past week we’ve had some great new members join us. Just to drop some names: Rhodmhire, Gidetisms, Auremena and Neo Arcad may ring a bell from the generalite and F7 crowd, Saugeais and Burchadinger from the NS-Sports crowd, Nullarni and Lowell Leber from the New Warsaw Pact. From the roleplay community, we’re honoured to welcome New Azura from Gholgoth, Praetonia from Haven, In addition to New Emperica, YellowApple, Libaries and Rastynhaven. I’m also very happy to invite LadyRebels back to the battlefield; she’s been lightening up the mood around the place and working very hard. LadyRebels, of course, is a former delegate of The South Pacific and a former prominent member of the Atlantic Alliance, one of the most famous invader organizations in NS History. So we’re very happy and very fortunate to have her join our team.

Finally, last update, I announced that our organization was in need of a new Chief Lieutenant as Spartzerium, our past Chief Lieutenant is transitioning out of the League to join the Black Hawks. It’s my pleasure to announce that Carta (also known as Milograd) will be The United Defenders League’s new Chief Lieutenant. When I was creating The United Defenders League --not many people know this-- but it was actually Carta who designed our organization’s symbol. I asked for a design which would become iconic and I thought he had nailed it at the time and still do. The task of the Chief Lieutenant is often to keep the forum tidy and looking nice and act as my confidant and consultant; like Spartz, Carta has a heart of gold and a subtle wisdom that will serve him well in this capacity.

Oh and Movie Night: Saturday, Feb 4th 20:00 EST. No idea what we’re watching, but I’ll figure it out. Come join us on the night; we’ll be opening up our military channel (#udl on Espernet) to the public as usual.

And your Moments of Zen to make up for the admittedly crappy one last update,
<Riemstagrad> we're just chatting Unibot
<Ballotonia> Spotting, Riemst. It's called spotting.
<Blaat|learning> like that movie... raidspotting... where a bunch of scottish drug addicts do stuff.
<@Unibot> According to Europeia's voting thread, I'm a misogynist, rules-breaking fenda with a "dark side".
<@Milograd> unibot is jack bauer
<+Sanctaria> "did we do a minor today?"
<@Mahaj> lol
<@Mahaj> i'm a minor...
<@Mahaj> this might not be that bad ;)
<@Unibot> "The All Things Must Pass of Unibot II" <-- this pre-title was classier when I was grieving the retirement of Spartz more so than when my commendation is up to vote. >_>
<@Ballotonia> :D
* @Ballotonia had not noticed that yet
<@Milograd> looooooool @ unibot
<@Milograd> YOU SHALL NOT PASS D:<

May Justice Never Be Abandoned,
DISCLAIMER: THIS UPDATE IS COMPLETELY FICTIONAL BEYOND THE DISCLAIMER. I do not actually represent The West Pacific et. al. As you all know, NationStates recently changed servers. This caused the update order to be all messed up, so for example, the UDL’s headquarters now updates four minutes into update. Also, update is now much shorter, which us defenders are certainly appreciating. Nonetheless, to celebrate this glorious server change, I now present to you a UDL Press Release from a parallel world where there are only eight regions and I am the tyrant emperor of the West Pacific. The joke originates from when the mods and admins were testing the new server: they re-created NationStates and were playing around in some feeders with “Unibot” as the delegate of the West Pacific among other hilarities. Please enjoy!


A Public Service Announcement by the Capitalis de Societate of The United Defenders League and The Honorable Emperor of the Glorious Republic of The West Pacific,

Liberty hath begot terror and terror hath begot public virtue and victory. I called upon you, my fellow merrymen to unite in the War on Nasicournia but I have been greeted with weakness, vice and public insubordination from the most rotten and sullen parasites of our civil society.

Lest the common merryman forget the roots of the Republic that he now adores, I am obligated to recant our history to remind them of what hath made us strong and what maketh Nasicournia so injurious to our sublime design.

*slams fist on pulpit* The West Pacific was once a barren land of depravity and corruption led by demagogues until it was cultivated by our League of United Defenders and the Honorable Emperor – this is the Incontrovertible Word of Fris! Hail The Glorious Republic!! We hath made our society strong and virtuous; from the roots of our noble germination hath grown an awe-invoking vegetation of order.

We turn our attention now to Nasicournia, led by the despicable demagogue, Francos Spain. He overthrew our defender brotherhood and now offers ‘peace’ and ‘freedom’ to the Nasicournians when it is war and discipline that hath made us strong and it is war and discipline that hath provideth the double-tongued demagogue his trophy. We heed The Rejected Realm’s “No Sedge” policy; death shall come to the New Sedge Order that have corrupted the Pacific with its support of the Francoist regime.

It is time that we organize our army of honor and liberate Nasicournia from the infidels. HARK OUR LORD, FRIS. AMEN. But it is not enough to simply advance Nasicournia; we shall improve our own region: we shall protect our liberties by enforcing our new Crimes Against Liberty passed today by holy decree; no longer may your freedom of speech be diminished and neighbored by dissenters’ treachery. Hail Liberty! We shall eradicate and purge the Australians from the region! *slams fist wildly* Hail Purity! We shall expand the Glorious Republic to the New World, where local tyrants and savages soil the lesser Pacifics: the North, East and South, with their incivility – we shall teach them virtue from vice and with time they shall be our resilient offspring. Hail Fecundity!

Supplicate, Respect and Fear, my friends.

This is your Moment of Terror:

<@Eluvatar> I hate how TNI has "The region who Conquered The Rejected Realms! " in their WFE
<@Eluvatar> 1. They didn't keep it
<@Eluvatar> 2. They weren't the first, by a long shot
<@Goobergunch> note to self
<@Goobergunch> find 42 friends
<@Goobergunch> take TNI Delegacy for one update
<@Mahaj> lol
<@Goobergunch> claim to be "The $group That Conquered TNI"

Justice Shall Not Be Abandoned... For Long,


A Letter from the Capitalis de Societate of the United Defenders League,

So, this is our first *real* update in a bit (since we jumped the shark last update), sorry about that, we just got internally busy doing some things. The first thing that happened was something in real life, in fact, Earth (also known as Lyanna Stark), former Chief of Recruitment and current Osiris Pharaoh met me, Unibot, Chief of the Band. We had a nice get-together in Florida and had a fun time attempting to share an IRC account (as UniE!).

<+Blaat> i'm prolife, we should not abort missions!
@Unibot bounces (Earth)
<+Jamie> heh
<@Unibot> ...that came out wrong. O.o
<+Blaat> wait
<+Blaat> if it comes out wrong, put it back in again
<+Blaat> sorry
<+Jamie> O.o
<@Unibot> *Earth whaps Blaat*
+Blaat rubs his cheek, that hurt :)
@Unibot high-fives Blaat
<+Blaat> heh
@Unibot whaps Uni IRL
<+Blaat> masochism?
<+StGeorge> lul
+Solm has weird mental images of Earth and Uni together
<@Unibot> ...I can't win. -Earth.

That marks the first and only time that I will say “hmphies” on IRC. Earth got the full Unibotian experience, including: (1) writing an appeal to the moderators to unban me, (2) tickling me, a lot, I shall add, (3) meeting my incredibly nice parents (apparently they’re nice), (4) watching my expression of “pure horror” when I heard gossip at the dinner-table for the first time (foreign to my natural Canadian inclinations), (5) hearing how to pronounce “sorry” the Canadian (right) way.


Earth and Uni react to Catholic being raided.

Nonetheless, while I was away having fun in the Sunshine state, things apparently still revolved in NationStates. But like if the Sun had been removed from the galaxy, planets fell out of alignment and crashed into one another. Okay, so, not as dramatic as that, in fact, things ran fairly smoothly amidst my absence. Catholic however was raided by the DENTHEBLACKEUROSHAW monster; there arose several concerns for the natives’ rights and the treatment of the natives – first pressured for their religious beliefs on their Regional Message Board, and then denied their right to return with a password imposed on the region. UDL Lieutenant, Mahaj acted swiftly and drafted a liberation proposal in the World Assembly Security Council, which was recently passed, although antiquated by the raiders’ predictable removal of the password. The liberation prevents a password being imposed again by the raider delegate. Likewise, in the theme of religion, The Black Hawks are currently holding Atheist Empire, which we’ve had one attempt to liberate – we’ll be attempting another during this week.

We recently held a very productive Chiefs of Staff meeting where we decided many new things and I’ve since worked on them. (1) We have a new rank called “Senior Merryman” for those of our merrymen that demonstrate considerable expertise, (2) We will be establishing monthly awards either this month or next month which will cover a range of defender-y things and reward dedication and demonstrations of admirable conduct – our lieutenants will happily hand them out, (3) We’ve decided that having one person as the “Chief of Recruitment” hasn’t been working so great – so we’ve motioned for the creation of the Grand Recruitment Council which will feature some surprising faces (if all goes as planned) and we’ve got some big ideas planned to expand the Greenwood Band to far reaches of the forest. Lastly, congratulations to Earth on her new position as our Chief of Orientation; we’re starting up a new training program on IRC which has been so far a wild success – I’ve heard good things from new merrymen about Earth and her assistants’ classroom.

We’ve had many new members join as of late, former ADN high command, Biyah and former ADN member, Agamemnon (no, Microsoft Word’s Autocorrect, I do *not* mean AND, I mean ADN.. ugh..) from their awesome home region of Osiris. We’ve also welcomed WA Author, Libraria and Ausitoria, Welsh Cowboy, Cookie Monsters from Canada, Paper Flowers, Barronstan, Unified Provinces, Groundisred, Morphix from Dharma, New Sapienta, Nigel Farage from United Kingdom. As well as our newest Evil Condemned™ Slave-Trader, Greater Tezdrian, Jahka from Europeia and Tzeentch from the Ascendancy. In addition to our new members from NS-Sports: Ipeland, The Kangaroo Republic and Yesopalitha.

Lastly, in the Defender Awards 2012, UDL members have been racking up lots of nominations. Some of the more interesting nominations: (1) Defender of the Year features Eluvatar and myself in competition (MUHAHAHA), (2) The UDL has been nominated for Defender Group of the Year and Newcomer of the Year, (3) I think this marks the first time that a two-time winner of the NS World Cup has also been nominated for Newcomer of the Year (Zwangzug!), (4) Ballotonia, Goobergunchia, Harmoneia and Spartzerium (in order of seniority AND also alphabetical.. boo yea!) have all be nominated for a Lifetime Achievement Award, (5) I am the first time someone has been nominated for “Meltdown of the Year” and Defender of the Year, (6) Christopher Plummer has been nominated for Best Supporting Actor. Much to my shagrin, we’re all facing steep competition from TITO, FRA, UK and RRO defenders in various categories – nonetheless, the coveted award ceremonies kicks off voting in the next week or two.

Oh and Movie Night is next Saturday at 10 PM EST. I have no idea what we’re watching, but it’ll be fun. All are invited.

And pardon my indulgence, but here is your Moment of Zen:

<+New_Emperica> OMG ITS UNIBOT!
<@Unibot> ^_^
* +New_Emperica freaks out like a little fanboy.
<@Unibot> Hi!
<+New_Emperica> Hi.
<@Earth> d'aw. :P
<@Unibot> This is your first liberation, correct?
<+New_Emperica> Da.
<@Unibot> You're going to do fine.
<+New_Emperica> If push comes to shove, I have a lead pipe, some gasoline, and a pissed off cat that can be dumped on a guy's head at any time.
<+New_Emperica> I like meeting Unibot.
<@Mahaj> <New_Emperica> I like meeting Unibot. <--Uni's gonna post that quote everywhere i swear to god
<+New_Emperica> Yes, he will.
<+New_Emperica> And I'll get to be quoted by Uni.
@Earth hides behind Uni.
+New_Emperica fantasizes.

May Justice Never Be Abandoned,

A Letter from the Capitalis de Societate of the United Defenders League,

The 2012 Defender Awards, that we told you about last time, just announced its winners. The United Defenders League is very honoured to pick up the Defender Group of the Year Award and The Newcomer of the Year Award (which we shared with our merryman, Ravania). Also, congratulations to our Chief of Intelligence, Eluvatar for winning the Dipes Award for his contributions to the field of intelligence. We as a group would like to thank all the voters, native communities across NationStates, our mothers, alarm clocks, Max Barry, caffeine, Max Berry, the F5 key and The Founderless Regions Alliance for hosting the Awards ceremony. *music plays* Hey wait, I’m not done with the update! How rude, hmphf.

As for internally, The United Defenders League has been busy getting the Great Recruitment Council off the ground. The guys and I have been putting our heads together to find new and exciting ways to improve recruitment; I don’t think any of them are legal *sniggers* but hypothetically they’d be pretty neat. Well, to start things off, you can now find our telegram advertisements sandwiched in between a couple of raider group telegrams when you create a new nation and view its telegram box – but it’s a start! Thank you to Solm, one of our beloved merryman, for putting together the auto-recruiter script; we’ve generally strayed away from recruiting fresh newbies but we’ve decided it’s time to end that! To improve our effectiveness we’ve got some wacky ideas that might blow some minds when they’re released, but to start off with, we’ve compensated for the lack of annoyingness (because we’ve used less bold tags) by adding animated arrows that non-subtly point you to the message that will change your life!!

In addition to recruitment, The United Defenders League now includes a legal department. Our newly established Judge Advocate General's Corps, currently managed by Agamemnon, will provide legal counsel for our defenders and staff or others in cases we deem as falling under the umbrella of “cases that the UDL is interested in”. Defenders, like police officers in real life, tend to go to court a lot, so I think this service could be of mighty use. The legal department will also be consulted in interpretations of regional law when stuff happens that requires legal consultation. For example:

<Mahaj> Oh noz.
<St. George> Is that illegal in The North Pacific?
<Unibot>… *glances at the legal code… the constitution… the bill of rights…* Um… this could take a bit to figure out; they’ve codified their region flag!?!?!
<Agamemnon> It’s illegal under c.8 of their Bill of Rights and c.11… but c.11 applies to everything.
<Unibot> Ah thank violet!

That was a simulated conversation by the way; St. George doesn’t actually care about breaking rules (kidding!).

In our military operations, we’ve had a great week or two. We defeated the Black Riders and co. in Liberal Haven, which meant we had to endow our soldiers with some pretty badges:


St. George, Carta, Zwangzug and our new-ish member, Nullarni get hugs and chocolate cake for being the only four to attend both attempts to liberate A Liberal Haven (the second attempt was successful, the first was close… but lacking in cigars). We also had some great defenses against The Black Hawks and the Black Riders, like in the United Lands of Catalystia, Kingdom of Ireland, District 10, Western Europe, Frozen wastes of Ralarii, The Youngworld, Together In Isolation and The Great Green Federation. There was also a sneaky raid in Deutschland which we caught and stopped before it could progress.

I recently re-created the German team from the infamous Monty Python skit, Philosopher’s Football Match, which can be found in the 1972 Munich Olympics. Which means you may occasionally see some philosophers kicking raider butt around NationStates from now on. Highlights thus far include Team Captain, Georg “Nobby” Hegel demonstrating his ‘Master-Slave dialectic’ against The Black Riders in the defense of “The Great Green Federation” and Franz Beckenbauer defending “Together In Isolation” from TBH and DEN:

@Goobergunch> Seconds ago: The Republic of Franz Beckenbauer became regional WA Delegate.
<+Saugeais> Beck!@
<IG> Very nice
<Wibblefeet> congrats
<@Goobergunch> defense successful

Speaking of sports, The United Defenders League is pleased to sponsor the Tournament of the Golden Arrow, a roleplayed archery event in NS-Sports which is being organized by Zwangzug and I. It’s our way of giving back to the community that’s been *so* helpful and contributive to the defender cause. You know, when I was first starting up the UDL, people were particularly critical of my choice to include roleplayers into our staff, but it always seemed like the natural thing to do: they were always online and many of them were very nice. I’m really glad I kept with it – nowadays our roleplayers are some of the most distinguished and experienced members and the UDL enjoys a multicultural element that I don’t think exists in many other organizations in NationStates. I will circulate the dates and links for the Tournament when they’re up shortly; nonetheless, the Tournament is open to all!

In other news, as was explained earlier, at the end of the month will we be handing out awards to our merrymen and merrywoman. These awards are our organization’s monthly awards in the same manner as other defender organizations do. Details on the awards can be found here. Also, if you’re interested, Nullarni has written an interesting essay on our oath and has brought up some very interesting observations.

Our Movie-Night will take place on...the one... the only… APRIL FOOLS DAY: NationStates’s consistently funniest day of the year. No word on if any shenanigans will be played on people.

Your Moment of Zen is in two parts,

First, on a particularly boring night, Goober spotted something!

<@Goobergunch> Seconds ago: The Guiding Light of Francos Spain replaced the Supreme Bunnyness of Krulltopia as regional delegate.
<@Mahaj> WUT

And then from a discussion on Francos Spain, the conversation quickly deteriorated,

<+Astro> Like replacing every seventh word with "penis"?
<+Wied> The seventh word in that sentence is penis...
<+Astro> Oh, I didn't even notice. rofl.
<@Eluvatar> lol
<@Mahaj> lol
<@Goobergunch> I prefer replacing every word over five letters with "penis"
<@Mahaj> why, so only raiders will be saying things other than 'penis' ?
<@Goobergunch> It forces people to compose statements with brevity
<+Astro> You just wrote "It penis penis to penis penis with penis."
<+Astro> We are so puerile. I mean penis.

May Justice Never Be Abandoned,


A Letter from the Capitalis de Societate of the Alliance Defense Network and the former United Defenders League,

So I got talking with Pope Hope, former Director of the Alliance Defense Network about how to improve The United Defenders League and it came to my attention that the best way to get all of the talented, older players out of the woodwork and have them sign up with my defender organization would be to adopt the name, constitution and logo of the Alliance Defense Network and offer them all their old positions and titles.

It is thus my honor to present to you:

With Strength and Honor, The Alliance Defense Network Reborn operates by protecting its member-regions and ensuring that native rights are upheld across NationStates. We're still in the process of switching over ranks and re-naming categories, so please be patient, by in due time, The Alliance Defense Network Reborn will be fully operational once we get rid of all these bows and arrows and green tights *shudders*.

If you wish to join the initiative, here are some important applications:

After offering titles and prestige to her for several hours and promising she could declare martial law whenever her heart desired, Pope Hope is our new Director – fresh out of retirement. Congratulations, Pope Hope!

Likewise, after much consultation and torture sessions which may or may not have involved copious amounts of muffins
, Ananke is our new Secretary of State. Congratulations, Ananke!

If you’d like to greet Pope Hope or Ananke back into the ADN world, they both should be on the ADN Reborn’s IRC channel (#ADN on Espernet) around 1 PM EDT today. The channel is 100% public notwithstanding idiotic/spammer conduct. Click here to join the channel.

For those that can’t be there to greet them in public I sat down with these two NS superstars earlier this week to interview them.

Unibot: What are your plans for the Alliance Defense Network Reborn (“ADN Reborn”)? More specifically, what does the ADN Reborn need to improve on from the ADN days?

Pope Hope: Old invader friends and acquaintances (and invaders I’ve only met recently) have told me that raider unity is currently at an all-time high. That this is even a term now is a big change from the days of yore. They say that due to the absence of the ADN, technical changes in the game, and the evolution of the political atmosphere of gameplay in general, they now take regions on a nightly basis. Invaders attempted to copy the ADN and unite in my day but never got far off the ground. This presents a challenge I just can’t resist.

ADN Reborn will emerge as a more condensed form of its previous incarnation, more to-the-point and less apologetic. The spirit of defending has changed as have technical aspects of gameplay, but when it comes right down to the battle of principles, the essentials are still the same. It’s time to bring a bit of old school defending back to NS, and introduce the newer generations of invaders to the iron fist of justice…and possibly the Care Bear Opposition Ambassador mask, that was pretty awesome.

Ananke: Well, we only had half the feeder/sinkers as members of ADN in its heyday, so we clearly need to get the rest of them involved. The Pacific already applied to ADN once, so I’m sure we won’t have any trouble getting them to do so again. Besides us old-timers have to stick together. So my first order of business as Secretary of State will be to hunt down the old foggies around NationStates and pressgang them into joining up. ;)

Unibot: Ananke, You've recently become the delegate of 10000 Islands, congratulations. Do you think your membership in 10000 Islands will conflict with your ADN Reborn membership? And do you think the relationship between 10000 Islands and the ADN Reborn will be erm, cozier than with the Original ADN because of your delegateship? *Wink, wink* *Nudge, Nudge*.

Ananke: TITO and ADN have always been great allies, so I don’t think my delegacy will change much. One thing that being delegate of 10ki has taught me though, is the power of muffins. It’s amazing the things you can accomplish by bribing people with their favourite flavour of muffin. By transferring this method to ADN I hope to quickly subdue any critics we might have.

Unibot: Pope Hope, What do you miss most about defending or NationStates in general, and what do you miss least?

Pope Hope: Most? The community. I met some amazing people through this game and I miss interacting with them on a regular basis. I miss Nasicournia at her most active, when every aspect of the region was thriving and there were so many involved residents: those who participated in regional government/politics, others who stuck mostly RL chat, our wonderful community of RPers, of course NasiCorps/defenders, and those who did a little bit of everything. In the early days, it was rewarding interacting with established leaders from RP regions like The Heartland and Wysteria, and learning the ropes from defender regions like Alcatraz and The Moonlit Islands. RPing with Nasi’s first allies from A New Begining and Cannabis Island. Hanging out with the ever-inspiring residents and loyal allies of the still-thriving region of Texas. I miss the wonderful defender groups I was a part of, and “Defender Unity” in general.

The ADN was such a collection of characters—hundreds of people united in defending but otherwise so diverse in regional background, culture, and personality. Even during the time we had members with conflicting ideologies, there was never a dull moment. The GLA, the best of the best who truly accomplished some amazing feats without claiming recognition. Exploring the cultures of other regions. Bantering with my favorite invaders. The Meritocracy when it was a bastion of debate and diplomacy. The North Pacific, my adopted feeder home which was also home to a lot of caring people, invigorating OOC forums, and an appreciation for democracy. Having a war of words with in-game “opponents” who also became OOC friends. Espionage. Late nights up plotting with my favorite defender “partners in crime” about deep cover special ops and military missions. Waiting for update on nights that the most exciting battles took place and/or as months of planning came to fruition. IRC chats with NS Generalites and Mods. Hmm, a lot to look forward to re-visiting. :)

Least? It was a different time then, and NationStates a unique community. While the politicking/propagandizing that went on (to this day people still ask me about events that never happened and to clarify rumors, some of which are pretty amazing) was sometimes frustrating/tiresome at the time, after leaving NS and traveling around the interwebz I figured out that there was a kind of respect here that might not necessarily be found elsewhere. Oh, and sleep deprivation—I don’t miss that too much. ;)

Unibot: Ananke, I must ask a much more serious question now, um... how do you pronounce your name? Is it, Anna-kay? Or A-nan-ke or what? This may or may not have been the topic of a serious debate over in the now defunct UDL chamber. *ninja-face*

Ananke: A-nan-ke is how I pronounce it.

Unibot: Pope Hope, You had a legendary career as a defender, a politician, the head busybody of one of NationStates’ most well-known organizations (soon to be reborn). To the new generation of players, do you have any advice for them on how to succeed as you did?

Pope Hope: In any endeavor you embark upon, at first you might have to start out playing multiple roles yourself. In region building, you’ll be the regional leader, recruiter, military advisor, RP organizer, what have you. Stay very active, and recruit for quality rather than quantity. Do it right and you’ll soon find other like-minded people to take the lead from you and improve upon the foundation that you’ve built.

Find out what you’re the most interested in/have the most fun doing and specialize in that skill—the more time you spend doing something you love the more successful you’ll be. Don’t shy from having mentors—there are other people out there who have done amazing things, can introduce you to new concepts/groups/techniques, and generally teach you cool stuff. When you start to succeed, stay humble and realize that it takes a cohesive team to really succeed/meet goals—it shouldn’t be all about one person or even a select few.

Don’t insult your opponents unless they’ve been genuinely nasty to you—and you’ll probably find that they’re not so bad off the battlefield, and maybe worth getting to know. Be cautious with who you trust, but once you learn who those people are, stay loyal to them and they’ll give the same in return. Take a step back if you start taking things too seriously, unplug if necessary, or even change direction. Start over—reload, if you will. ;) Most of all, have fun with everything you do.

And with that concludes our update for today!

Your Moment of Zen from October 27 2011,
<+SL> if the ADN turned into the FRA, and then FRA turned into the UDL, the UDL will turn into a new ADN then, right?
<+SL> whats the new ADN gonna look like?
<@Unibot> Badass.

With Strength and Honour,


A Letter from the Capitalis de Societate of the United Defenders League,

Wow, lot’s to talk about! So at the beginning of the week we had our April Fools Day… or shall I say, I misguidedly thought that reinventing the Alliance Defense Network would be a good idea. Pope Hope was doing her best to sell the idea but by the evening that night, just a wave of pure *nostalgia* washed over me for my quiver full of arrows, hearty laughs and green tights. By gawd did I miss our forum and my band of merrymen and merrywomen, but it was fun being ADN for a day. For those of you who missed the April Fools joke, you can visit our now public archives and you’ll see the whole event is archived including the cold, blue steel and glass skin that represented the ADN Reborn oh so perfectly.

Some highlights included: (1) Pope Hope’s first and hopefully not her last post on our forum where she officially declared martial law dissolved the Alliance Defense Network Reborn, (2) The North Pacific joining the ADN Reborn and simultaneously declaring war on us as a part of the Empire, (3) Biyah being masked as an “Undesirable” for his part in the Empire’s takeover of Osiris, The North Pacific and The Rejected Realms -- some of the jabs back and forth between Biyah and I may have been a little *too* fun, (4) JAL (aka Durk) having respect on our boards for one whole day as our media advisor instead of his usual, “Village Idiot” masking (although I still think the Village Idiot has a vital role to play in the modern rural society).

Several UDL members, although not in the UDL capacity were enjoying the NationStates’ wide April Fools day event. Earth (as “Lyanna Stark”), our Chief of Orientation and Eluvatar, our Chief of Intelligence were having a fun time planning the revolution against Max Barry. Eventually of course, the NationStates community won over the heart of Max Barry before April Fools day ended. Although one player believed that the IPO scam was just a Unibotian plot all along to teach peace and socialism to the masses via demonstration:

<+Riemstagrad> it's all just one big conspiracy of Unibot!
<@Ballotonia> Yes, yes it is! (what is?)
<+Riemstagrad> i mean... look at the IPO pie-chart!
<+Riemstagrad> it is Unibot's flag

And it continues…

Anyways the only scheme going on was the cultivation of good feelings in regards to the power of the NationStates Community to collectively overcome individual selfishness that was detrimental for the whole (sound familiar) and with that mischievous cultivation came some new members for The United Defenders League like Almaniania, Laysley, Wyominger, Lumierea, Wrightstates and Phillippanoa! Muahahahahaha.

Outside of the IPO, we’ve had some other great members join the League this month like Lackadaisical2 and Nationstatelandsville from NationStates General; Demphor, Mewsland, Goldsaver, Danatha, Winland, Hjornis ; Greater Evil Imperial Japanese Dystopia and The Black Plains straight from the warmongering of International Incidents; Thatius and Audioslavia from NS-Sports; Astrolinium and Sovreignry from the WA Community; John Pressman from the United Kingdom, Cassitopia from the South Pacific, Aleksotopia from the North Pacific, Fireeliand from Canada, Lords Flail from the West Pacific. Whoo… that was a mouthful, welcome to the UDL, guys! At least the Grand Recruitment Council has been a smashing success – oh and congratulations to Parhe who finally remembered to post his pledge to complete his application to the UDL… only a few months later. :P

In addition to those new members, Gauntleted Fist, a long-time Generalite and member of Lazarus has joined our band of merrymen this month and we’ve bestowed him the title of “Vice Chief of Feeder Affairs”. Our Chieftaincy of Feeder Affairs is tasked with the duty of helping to provide a voice to our institution for the feeders and sinkers on issues specific to Game-Created Regions and we thought, who better to do that than a long-time resident of a sinker, eh? But of course, Gauntleted Fist is fairly new to these gameplay politics so we’ve appointed probably one of the most experienced people on the matter that I could get to helm the Chieftaincy and replace the always sharp, Neo Kervoskia – congratulations to Goobergunchia on his appointment as our Chief of Feeder Affairs! Good luck to both of you! Feel free to say hello to the new Chieftaincy at their public office.

These appointments of course come on the heels with the apology in the South Pacific for my unethical conduct; by lobbying a treaty in the South Pacific to people that happened also to be my soldiers, I broke a serious ethical relationship between professionals. We’ve proposed some policies to hopefully prevent this behavior in the future and draw some clear ethical lines to follow, although our initial draft has been vetoed from complaints from other feeder governments, since it became apparent it would have caused problems elsewhere. We’ll keep you updated on the newest drafts in the future.

This past month we’ve been cleaning up on defences; with some help from TITO, we were able to defend Former United States in a crushing 10-3 victory, defended The YoungWorld for the second time this month and had a *shut-out* on the last major update of March. Raiders were unable to capture anything that night, overwhelmed by defenders in various regions. Good job team!

Let’s see, what’s next, oh yeah, so we’re at war with LKE now. Here’s the UDL statement in response. Um... yeah… right, moving on, nothing more really to say here…

Anyways. We’ve just recently handed out the *new* Monthly Awards for our merrymen – the recipients were decided by the lieutenants. Ravania picked up “Detagger of the Month”, North Wiedna ran away with “Conservationalist of the Month”, Danny causally strolled from the proceedings with a “Spotter of the Month” award in his hands, Zwangzug strutted her stuff to pick up the “Liberator of the Month” and Fischstan stole the show with the “Most Defences of the Month” award. Carta was also awarded the Chief’s Award for overcoming great tribulations to be all that he can be and for his dutiful address to the diplomatic incident in the South Pacific that carefully balanced his role as Chief Lieutenant and his citizenship in said region. Each recipient was awarded an aquamarine gemstone in honour of the month of March:


Hhhhmmm purdy.

Okay and last but not least. Movie Night is this Saturday, April 7. 21:00 EST. The movie is “The Life of Brian”, our apologies in advance in areas of Wales included the townships of Biggletoftwick, Knobbiewardinewhimper and Nantstrathchurch, Oxfordshire where the film is still unfortunately prohibted – but for everyone else, Movie Night is open for all!! Raider, Defender, Generalite, Roleplayer, NSer, Non-NSer, Pope Hope, Not Pope Hope, NS-Sporter … whatever, come on out.

<@Mahaj> unibot rarely puts the best quote into the update
<+Blaat> because the best ones happen when he's not there

Ahhh… sooo much pressure….

Here is your Moment of Zen:
<@UNIBOSS> Lacky, I hope we've made a good first impression. :D
<@UNIBOSS> We'll train you sometime later unless you want to be trained now.
<+Parhe> trained?
<+Lacky> You're all silly.
<+Parhe> We must be trained?
<+Libby> What's wrong?
<@UNIBOSS> Yep Parhe. :(
* @Goobergunch puts a silly hat on Lacky's head
<+Parhe> I can sit and fetch already
<@Mahaj> we must all be toilet trained
* +Blaat pees in the channel.

May Justice Never Be Abandoned,


A Letter from the Capitalis de Societate of the United Defenders League,

The United Defenders League liberated ITALIA from The Black Hawks last week in what has to be one of the smoothest liberations in a long time. It all started at about 2 AM on Thursday when I decided that we would try to liberate ITALIA in twenty-three hours, as opposed to doing it on Saturday – which was a move I didn’t think the Black Hawks would anticipate because Friday night is generally a night chockfull of raids and defences. So I pulled an all-nighter and started telegramming and recruiting members for “Operation Little Stalingrad” and fortunately, we had a really good turnout; something along the lines of thirty merrymen showed up to help out ITALIA and eat some Hawk. We pretended not to have very many members online to defend, so I defended (and defended Federalist Europe Alliance from a raid by myself! MUHAHAA) and the staff prepared everyone for the liberation. By the time, the liberation came around; the Black Hawks lead hadn’t bothered to watch update and we liberated ITALIA, 41-31. All the soldiers that took part in the liberation have been awarded this pretty military ribbon:


Other than that, it’s been quite slow for defending as of late, because raiders have been piling again, but we had a close, close loss to the Black Riders in Pacific (13-12) recently and a successful liberation in Western Africa earlier last week. We also just had a successful liberation in Hong Kong against a bunch of stooges calling themselves the "Royal Canadian Air Force" and endeavoring to “refound” founderless regions against their consent to bring security to them – they just leave the part out about them being the eternal and all-powerful founders of the region forever and ever after and other important details. It was a personal pleasure of mine as a real-life Canadian to liberate the region.

A lot of this past week has been full of drama.

First, our Judge Advocate General's Corps saw its first bit of action; Agamemnon, Judge Advocate with the United Defenders League has been sent to Democrats to represent South Boston Irishmen in court against several charges which are partially related to South Boston Irishmen’s work with The United Defenders League. I like to make sure that our members have access to justice when they’re being accused of things related to defending, so I’m glad we’re helping to defend South Boston Irishmen in his time of need for legal aid.

The second stint of drama came this past week when there was some heated dialogue exchanged between the Arch-Chancellor of the Founderless Regions Alliance and I in regards to the politicization of our organization. As I said in a public statement available here, I would quite like to move on and endeavor for better relations between defender organizations and more solidarity between what are essentially team-mates in the fight for justice. I guess as easy as it is for us to find common ground, the stress of our positions and duties pushes us towards in-fighting, not to mention that the defender organizations that stand today are the result of years of conflict between defenders and the social delineation of various groups. To do our part for the cause of defender solidarity, we’ve restored TITO’s viewing privileges on our private military forum and wish them the best.

To recap some administrative news: we’re very pleased to have established an embassy with ITALIA following their liberation; now even our Italian friends can receive our “Lettere dal Capobanda”! On a similar note, I’ve also taken the time to update our Embassy Row to include shiny regional flags for all our embassies – it looks purdy, you might enjoy that. If there’s a flag or emblem that needs correcting, please tell me and I’ll get on it.


The Tournament of the Golden Arrow; a roleplayed archery event that I told you about earlier will be kicking off at the end of this week. If you want to attend you need to sign up here before Sunday, April 22. There’s also a quiz that goes along with the tournament which influences your scores in the event – the more you know about NS-Sports, NS Gameplay and The United Defenders League, the better you’ll do in the tournament!

Finally, a shout out to Stargate for securing their region; I hear they’re working on a constitution and elections now, which is awesome – a great example for all founderless regions; doing their best to develop their region even after years of being raided.

Your Moment of Zen, brought to you by Carta’s telegram box:

<@Carta> The Anglophile of Earth22 (1 year 43 days ago) Hey! My name is Earth, and I'm from Europeia, one of the largest, most active and most prestigious regions in NationStates. I'd like to personally invite you to join our region.
<@Carta> <_<
<@Carta> old puppets lolz
<@Mahaj> yeah
<@Carta> LOL
<@Carta> bold skywalker (1 year 73 days ago) sorry- raiding mission want to join up?
<@Carta> i forgot that i tried out raiding once
<@Carta> before i became a rper
<@Mahaj> lol
Oh my! How things change in a year!

Question for the embassy: do you have any funny telegrams you’d like to share? :P

May Justice Never Be Abandoned,


A Letter from the Capitalis de Societate of the United Defenders League,

Well it has been a helluva week!

In this past week or so, The United Defenders League has been busy liberating regions like Baghdad and The Blood Cave against the Aphroditean Empire and the Black Hawks and DEN. In addition to liberating Zen this morning from the Europeian Navy and last major, Confederation of Democratic Socialists from god knows who. Kudos to The Founderless Regions Alliance Rangers for helping out on some of those liberations. Normally, I wouldn’t present ribbons for a comparably smaller liberation, but the artistic opportunity of a ribbon for Zen was irresistible – so all twenty-something merrymen received this ribbon this afternoon for a job well done:


Don’t wave this puppy around boys; the bad guys might think you’re surrendering.

Anyways, yeah, it has been a decent week to dust off the military chops. A lot of detagging (restoring previously raided regions) though, since it’s been a rather laborious week to clean up the mess left from several nights of tag-raids. Nonetheless, the merrymen are keeping up the good fight and restoring what was left in ruin along the aimless path of regional devastation. Some of our newest members that have joined to carry that good fight include our first MERRYCAT, the Asylum Manager, Fluffy Pink Kittens (see a trend here), Reselia, Crontor from International Incidents and Coolboygcp!

On the subject of new members, [violet], site admin of NationStates recently announced a moratorium would soon be implemented on all so-called “auto-recruiting scripts”. Now of course, The United Defenders League has indeed been using an auto-recruiter, although we don’t suspect that the loss of the tool will hurt our membership projections – at least not radically. So, on one hand this is a loss, on the other hand, we could look on the bright-side and suggest this is our way of regaining some freedom from wacky responses to auto-recruitment telegrams! Some of my favorites received in response to The United Defenders League’s advertisement include:

"I saw two words in your telegram. Immediately and destroy! I only assume one thing, you want to destroy me. Well screw you guys I'm going to join someone who can protect me!"

Good lord, I can think of two words I’d rather he had read. ;)

"It would be great if you stopped slavery"

That’s me, Abe “Unibot” Lincoln.

" Can I be a raider and a defender at the same time? I joined this game to take over regions and bend the weak to my will, but your organization sounds like the type of thing I might enjoy too."

Mitt Romney called, he wants his self-contradictoriness back.

"HOW ABOUT YOU GO **** YOUR OWN **** AND THEN SHOVE A PIECE OF **** UP YOUR OWN ********!!!! thats what I think of your bull***** **** mc**** piece of **** telegram"

I admire your passion and colorful choice of asterisks!

Our sincerest apologies to anyone who received double, triple etc. telegrams from our auto-recruiting nation last night, according to Solm, “the host developed an error that kept on restarting all [his] running processes there, but never killing any of them, so it just kept on making new instances of [his] auto-recruiting script”. Prompting Klaus Devestatorie, of course, to suggest that script had become SELF AWARE!! The problem has since been fixed; once again, sorry to anyone who was contacted multiple times, it certainly was not our intention. HHhhhm, on the note of Solm.

Congratulations to Solm and Zwangzug for their promotion to the rank of Lieutenant. Solm is the founder of Ellorea and formerly, Judea, an International Incidents star and one of our tech gurus in addition to an incredibly reliable defender who has been with the organization almost since its genesis. Zwangzug is one of the leading members of NS-Sports and one of the most dependable defenders we have on our staff, she’s always around when we need her to help out with a liberation and she’s been working with us since the very beginning too. These promotions, of course, follow the retirement of Ballotonia, whose service to the defending world is absolutely legend; very rarely does someone have the pleasure to have their heroes join them in their cause – he was an inspiration. Ballotonia is retiring to remain neutral in the game since he’s currently an admin-in-training/code-monkey/thingy – if you’re interested, I’d check out the Advanced Dossier tool that Ballotonia is trialling.

On the subject of Zwangzug, Zwangzug has been organizing The Tournament of the Golden Arrow – it started with 85 competitors, it’s down to just two: Bashan Korxlon of Milograd, the condemned, racist, genocidal hellhole that is new to NS-Sports vs. Aüra Agira of Jas?yun, managed by Commerce Heights, the commended veteran of NS-Sports and founder of NS-Economy –- couldn’t be more of an interesting finale for the tournament! If you want to participate, feel free to contribute to the roleplay with commentary here.

Lastly, The UDL Monthly Awards will kick off this week and I’ll announce the winners either in an extra or another update.

Question for the Embassy: Ravania is running bets on the UDL forum on how much the population of NationStates will drop on Sunday night since it is 28 days after the IPO, April Fool’s event– take your bets in that thread or post them here and I’ll add them to the list. How much do you think NationStates’s population will drop on Mondaygeddon?

Here’s your Moment of Zen,

<@Unibot> I remember pre-public UDL.
<@Unibot> That was fun. :P
<+Quadrimmina> What Quad read: pre-pubic UDl.
<@Carta> p. much the same thing, Quadrimmina
<@Carta> we've...
<@Carta> ...
<@Carta> grown since then...
<@Carta> @_@
<+Quadrimmina> Haha.
<+Quadrimmina> The UDL hit puberty?
<@Carta> it's natural
<@Carta> and it happens to all organizations
<+Quadrimmina> It's just a part of growing up.
<+Quadrimmina> Nothing to be ashamed of.
* +Quadrimmina fears the day that the UDL's sex drive kicks in.
<@Carta> already has probably

May Justice Never Be Abandoned,



THE WINNERS OF THE MONTHLY UNITED DEFENDERS LEAGUE AWARDS HAVE BEEN ANNOUNCED! Several members picked up a diamond gemstone in recognition of their great contributions to the Greenwood Band.

Secondly, Milograd has defeated Commerce Heights in the epic conclusion of the Tournament of Golden Arrow!

Finally, Astrolinium has won the bet we had running to guess how many nations would remain in NationStates after 28 days after April Fool's Day. Astrolinium was 75 nations off.

A Letter from the Capitalis de Societate of The United Defenders League,

It’s final, I’ll call it:


Cue the summer lull. Nah, but this is as good opportunity as ever to announce that business is back to usual, as new recruits have begun to pore in again (Welcome Zaklen and Nuvu!), after several weeks of admittedly humdrum business; mostly focusing on cracking off the administrative to-do list and completing the occasional de-tag or starring at the massive piling occurring in Scotland and Region of Reunited Muslim States -- in Region of Reunited Muslim States, rather extensive griefing has occurred over the past few weeks with the raid helmed by The Black Riders with assistance from The New Inquisition, The Black Hawks, The Kingdom of Denmark and The Land of Kings and Emperors ; approximately 64 natives have been ejected and banned (or around 70% of the region). Natives suggest that the griefing is anti-Islamic and have been pooling refugees into “RORMS” while their region is still being griefed and unfortunately piled by raiders.

Speaking of region griefing; Fischistan, a merryman with The United Defenders League has a WA Liberation coming to vote in a day to liberate The United Kingdom of Britain, which has been passworded and is being griefed by The Greater German Reich. If the WA liberation passes, I’m sure it’ll be a hot topic in the next update as defender forces will be squaring off against Nazi forces (our *favorite* guys to beat on).

As far as administrative stuff goes, as I said we had been primarily focused on administrative stuff. We’ve *finally* got the Senior Merryman program installed and released for merrymen.

Senior Merryman is a rank that all Merryman qualify for if they pass a standardized and particularly rigorous written exam based on our new UDL guide (which is the *best* defender guide I’ve ever seen, by the way) and demonstrate practical proficiency at liberating, defending and detagging. There was a nasty myth going around that troops from The United Defenders League are plentiful, but untrained and I hope with this new program we’ll see that myth nipped in the butt as Merrymen work towards the Senior Merryman position. All new lieutenants will have to be Senior Merrymen first, before being eligible for lieutenantship; so I can see this being a great incentive to get studying! A pass on the rigorous, closed-book written exam is 90% and a failure to pass requires merrymen to wait one week before attempting to write the exam again. Good luck to all budding Senior Merrymen!

We also, on the subject of administration, have two new awards which will be handed out this month: Triggerperson of the Month and Recruiter of the Month. Recruiter of the Month is self-explanatory; Triggerperson is a role in a modern army that requires a lot of technical skill and requires people to excel in performance under extreme pressure, essentially their job is to calculate and deliver the “move-time” for a mission. I look forward to awarding two well-deserving recipients at the end of the month. Furthermore, during the administrative clean-up, I decided that the main “defender” puppet storage region, Kyzikos, needs a regional flag! If you have ideas, please submit them here.

Also, we’re very pleased to welcome Dalimbar into our staff as a Senior Policy Advisor and he’s been spending the past week or so providing advice on internal matters and foreign policy; I look forward to working with him in the coming months. Dali has a very long track-record as a successful feeder politician and seasoned foreign affairs expert.

Okay enough administrative stuff. Let’s get to the nitty gritty; in the past few days, we’ve been catching up for lost time with various liberations and defences. Out of defences, my personal favorite must be “Continent of Pwned”, where raiders were pwned: attempting to make it look as though defenders had raided the region, the raiders were swiftly and effortlessly ejected and banned from the region by the defender lead. As for liberations, we had a great liberation against DEN in Great White Brotherhood (not a supremacist region) – the final score was 7 to 5 for endorsements.

Likewise, yesterday, we liberated Hong Kong from Aphroditean Empire, in a close 6-5 victory. Now, this mission wasn’t large enough to earn a mission ribbo--

<+Soviet_Canuckistan> and I assume the ribbon will be ready soon

Alright, alright Soviet Canuckistan. I suppose it was a fun mission. Here’s the official mission ribbon:


Okay, um final news for this update; congradulations to Ipeland, who is now hosting the prestigious Baptism of Fire tournament in NS-Sports and.. oh yeah, here’s a load of Moments of Zens.

<@Solm> Watch out for Sexiness.
<@Solm> The region, not Carta :P

<@Mahaj> :(
<@Mahaj> don't have to rub it in :(
<@Unibot> That's going in the next update :P
<@Milograd> ?
<@Milograd> that's our moment of zen?
<@Milograd> goddamn it i had a streak goign >:
<@Milograd> If I'm not included in Zen moments, I lose my purpose in the UDL. :<
<@Mahaj> and by better, he means some sickly nonsense that shamelessly promotes him :p
<@Milograd> Because let's be honest now, that's the most you see of me in the gameplay forum. :<
<@Mahaj> Unibot is a sexy beast who is the shining light of every girl's dreams
<@Mahaj> ^ there. moment of zen
<@Earth> that's why we sleep with the lights off, Mahaj

And when Mall (raaarrh, raider) snuck in our IRC Channel:

<Mall> hahahahahaha come to the dark side. we have... well we have GWB and RORMS.
<@Goobergunch> you have George W. Bush?
<@Goobergunch> EWWWWW
<Mall> BLEH

And finally,

-By Tim-Opolis. Chief of the Van

It was a sunny day in Florida. I was chilling at Universal Studios in Orlando Florida. Buying up my Slytherin merchandice at the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. When suddenly out of the corner of my eye. I saw it! There was only one of this bot anywhere! It was a Unibot! But then I thought about it. "But wait. Unibot lives in Canadia." But it looked so much like him. I was tempted to go over and say hi so I could have the chance of blackma *cough* meeting the leader of the UDL, but I thought it would be awkward if it wasn't him. So I kept walking, still certain that I had seen the one robot that must be Uni Bot. Later, I was chilling in the Three Broomsticks, sipping on my Butterbeer, when I saw him again. Sitting at a table, eating what seemed to be chicken, was that Unibot character that I think defends or something like that. I was sure it was him! Yet he was with what looked like Parental Bots so I did not approach for I was with my homies. And one does not simply abandon their homies to go meet a Bot. Even if it is the Uni Bot. So I walked away.

Later on MSN, This One Bot and I were talking and I found out that it actually was him. I raged. I screamed. I didn't break a keyboard over my knee. But I was pretty damn angry. This had been a chance to blackma *cough cough cough* say hello to the guy that tried to Commend Just Guy. The guy that some TNI troops still don't know. Unibot. It was a terrible moment. I wept deeply. And then I got over it. And went to eat some bacon.
The End.

That's 100% real, by the way.

May Justice Never Be Abandoned,


A Letter from the Capitalis de Societate of The United Defenders League,

Ah, seems like an average week here in The United Defenders League. Albeit a little slow; a lot of our membership has been away doing exams and whatnot with school; I heard there was an attempted liberation of Alliance of Socialist States. But yep, overall it’s been very laid back with a lot of tea-drinking, we’re huge tea-drinkers during updat—

1 minute ago: The Wouldn't It Be Nice of Unibot II ceased to exist.

Ahh. *bites his lip* *passes out*


Actually, it turns out my deletion was an accident; but it certainly gave some members a scare.

NationStates Moderators (Saved. 12 hours ago)

Sorry about that deletion - it really was an accident. Had too many tabs open, and was intending to delete 'Unibot XI' which was maliciously impersonating you.

On the list of nightmares-come-true, this is near the top of the list. Okay! So a notice to all, ahem, rules-challenged people out there in NationStates, I recommend not impersonating me – it’s got to be in the top 5 reasons why people are DEAT’d.

In more serious news, Milograd has step down as our Chief Lieutenant. He felt it was his time to move on and has taken the ceremonial position of Guardian of The United Defenders League. He has left the organization in better shape than when he took his position and I wish him the best of luck as he pursues his candidacy for delegate in The South Pacific. Milograd’s duties as Chief Lieutenant were more administrative and often involved being my consultant and confidant – it’s a stressful job, because I’m a stressed out guy. Heh. My hope is that with my new appointment, the Chief Lieutenant will become more military-focused and Solm is the man for the task. Solm, like Milograd, has an extensive history as a roleplayer, but also one of our first members of the United Defenders League and one of the most accountable defenders on our staff. He often ran our minor updates when I couldn’t wake up for the morning and I feel confident in leaving him the organization to run when need be. Please wish Solm good luck; I know I do!

On other news, congratulations to ABK with his appointment as Chief of Orientation. He doesn’t even know he’s been picked yet from the selection of nominations, so this will be a surprise to him. *sniggers mischievously*. The Chief of Orientation’s position is extremely important because he will be making sure that we get everyone who signs up to join our organization, trained and welcomed and “used to” using our IRC channel; which is actually very important if we want to keep growing in membership size.

Okay what’s next on the list… hhhhmm; ah, yes Kyzikos got a flag finally! The contest ended with Sovreignry and Campinia, two of our Senior Merrymen, putting together the winner. Here it is:


This flag is obviously a combination of The United Defenders League and The Founderless Regions Alliance imagery – the two defender organizations that share the region.

Additionally in administrative news; The Hall of Honour has been constructed! The Hall of Honour is our memorial to all of the hard-working officers who have unfortunately had to leave us for various reasons. It was a pleasure unveiling the Hall of Honour and my hope is that in the future it’ll become even more of an honour to have one’s name engraved in its stone alongside such legends and greats of this game *waves to those on the memorial that are reading*.

Furthermore, the monthly awards winners have been announced! Congratulations to all the recipients!

Okay, the last major thing I need to discuss in this update is The United Defenders League’s first anniversary! In the future we may run the holiday just as a day, but it’s our first, so why not have some fun with it, eh? Yes, that’s right, it’s already been a full year since we started up The United Defenders League. The festivities will include gift-exchanging! (lightly roleplayed, of course), various games and activities; the festivities will begin June 7 and end June 13. I’ll post the sceduele for the event when I have it all finalized.

Alrighty, I thinkkkk, that’s all I need to blab to you about. See you around for the Anniversary celebrations! Congratulations to Eluvatar, our Chief of Intelligence, on becoming the delegate of the North Pacific.

If you want a laugh, go check out Mallorea and Riva’s anthropologic study into the depths of defenderdom on the Kyzikos Regional Message Board, here. If you don’t want to go that far for a laugh, here’s your Moment of Zen:

Fischistan was being inducted as a Rainbow Monkey Member via weird trials and rituals,

<@Solm> I've set your alarm to 1:30am. With a special message, that's when your death trials really begin
<+Fisch> quad said something about update surfing...
<+Fisch> from an early region
<@Solm> You'll just have to see when your phone wakes you up at 1:30am and music is blaring in your eyes, the lights are flickering on and off rapidly, and someone is in your bed.
<@Solm> Hmm… music blaring in your eyes….
<@Solm> Maybe that comes with being a rainbow-monkey?
<+Fisch> lol
<+Fisch> My eyes can hear, my ears can see
<Fisch> ew, I have lots of earwax

May Justice Never Be Abandoned,


A Letter from the Capitalis De Societate of The United Defenders League,

It’s been a fun week here at The United Defenders League. With June 13 upon us, the festivities to celebrate our organization’s first anniversary have now wrapped up and have been archived. I’m honoured that The United Defenders League has become such a successful defender organization and in my keynote address to the Festivities I discussed some of the fun history behind The United Defenders League (such as how we got our symbol!).

During the festivities, players ate chicken and partied in the Great Hall (which was later invaded by the Dutch Disease – RARRRH) and bought swords, shields, armor, clothing and wizardry supplies at the marketplace which can be worn as a badge on customer’s forum accounts.

The Robes of the Underworld was the most popular item bought, probably because it looks awesome:



In another part of the festivities, we bet on who would be the next poster (because UDLers seem to be big gamblers?), Kogvuron won that easily by tens of thousands. In a jousting tournament, Solm defeated me! Fischistan defeated Tim-Opolis and Camwood, looking like the champion until Almaniania (“The Champion of the Walrus”) defeated him after a long fought after battle.

During last week, The Black Hawks raided Capitalist Paradise; immediately, The United Defenders League staff launched a telegram campaign to inform natives and prompt them of an action plan: (1) remain calm, (2) unendorse the raider delegate, (3) endorse former native delegate. The administration of Capitalist Paradise quickly got involved with The United Defenders League becoming military liaisons on our forums. I have to honour the administration of Capitalist Paradise; I’ve been a defender for a while now and seen some regions who hardly put effort into getting their region back; but Afforess and Ad Vitam Adsum were in communication with us all day, telegrammed their community and help us organize a liberation. Ad Vitam Adsum also showed great leadership when he wrote an apology and condemnation of prior behavior to 10000 Islands in response to the griefing of Urbanites by Capitalist Paradise. In another week or so, Ad Vitam Adsum is expected to release the full post-liberation policy plan for Capitalist Paradise – talks of new recruitment, endorsements caps and a new regional army has already stirred up lots of discussion on the Capitalist Paradise Regional Message Board.

Unfortunately, The United Defenders League was not able to help Capitalist Paradise further, but The Black Hawks, threatened with the possibility of a liberation, placed a password on the region to avoid confrontation and then left the region shortly after. The incident was the spark to a firestorm of proposals to change the game’s code; influence, WA delegacy changes and much more have been suggested to be changed (you can find these proposals in Technical).

As for other military action: it’s been a slow week but we had a fun liberation in the Blood Cave against Lone Wolves United and Bacon Strips, a liberation in the Dictatorship Government Alliance against The Internationale where we hid and used Marxist flags to avoid being banned and ejected – we’re now being called “The Unprincipled Dictatorship Lovers” by The Internationale apparently to my amusement. We’ve had defences in Americano States against the Greater German Reich (with the FRA) and a defence of Nations of Christendom. We’ve been running detags and restoration missions all month and just arranged a failed attempt to liberate South America.

Now, for some fun news: CONGRATULATIONS to Fischistan and Ravania for their appointment as Lieutenants. We’ve needed a few more good men to serve as officers during updates; Fischistan is a regular recipient of UDL’s Liberator of the Month and Most Defences of the Month and regarded as one of the promising new stars in the game, Ravania is our lead Detagger and all around shining talent; both show considerable talent, expertise and a willingness to lead and organize. I wish them both good defending in the coming months.

We’re also very proud to announce our new recruits this month, including Romanoffia (Executive Councillor and recent runner-up for Delegate in The North Pacific), East Weidmanland, Alyekra (who has been kicking butt with Solm! Keep it up!), Druach and Anacasppia of Democratium, Cowardly Pacifists (Vice Minister of Foreign Affairs of Social Liberal Union and renowned WA Author!), Great Nepal (you may remember as the recipient of SC#24’s condemnation), Trilobitia (has been very very enthusiastic, I look forward to working with him more!), Brituarion from Democratic Socialist Assembly, Vitius, ZackStein, Alec W. G. Stuart and Vibhor O'Connor from United Kingdom and Bergnovinaia (recipient of SC#39’s commendation)!!

Although we’re getting a few new Lieutenants, we’re also VERY VERY excited to welcome Mahaj back to the battlefield. Mahaj has been taking the past few months off of active combat to serve as Osiris’s Kai Repat.

Well, I think that’s everything. Wait, do you want to bring back movie night? I want to do a movie night. Hhhm. Yes, let’s do a movie night.

July 23 8:00 PM EDT, we’ll watch Pirates of the Caribbean in the UDL IRC channel (#udl on Espernet). The channel will be made public for everyone; defenders, raiders, neutrals.

Here’s your Moment of Zen:

<+Fisch> I want unibot to be able to spot once more
<+Fisch> So I will make a robot do it for him :P
<@ABK> lol
<@ABK> The Unibot-bot

May Justice Never Be Abandoned,


A Letter from the Capitalis de Societate of The United Defenders League,

To whom it may concern: from one proud Canuck to another, Happy Canada Day!

Heh. Now what’s happened this past week? Well, we’ve gotten some great new members that I think we’re going to really enjoy having on our team. Welcome Vibhor O'Connor, from the United Kingdom! In addition to Callisdrun, long-time roleplayer, The Aurora Confederacy, beloved roleplayer from Global Economics and Trade, Meowfoundland, our newest merrycat, Dukopolious, Ellorn, Hawk Watcher, Funkadelia from Taijitu, Auralia, well-known WA author, and last but not least, Prince Windsor from the North Pacific.

We also have welcomed back Topid to our band of merrymen – I guess he just couldn’t resist those tights! In addition to Topid, we also said hello to our newest Judge Advocate, Hyanygo, who is fully qualified, having served as Europeia’s Attorney General, to represent our staff in legal disputes and provide other legal services when the need arises. Lastly, we welcomed Jenrak to our Greenwood Band last week; Jen has already been out defending and helped us successfully liberate The Galaxy just last week!

Speaking of liberating, wow has the United Defenders League been busy! We had three successful liberations in the past few days; we liberated Gargantuan from Democratium Cyber Warfare Units (DCWU) and The New Inquisition; in addition to liberating The Galaxy from Nazi Europe and Zoo from The Black Angels. We also have to thank our allies, The North Pacific Army, The Founderless Regions Alliance and The Royal Defence Force of United Kingdom for helping us liberate these regions and support these missions. A big shout out also goes to Ten Thousand Islands Treaty Organization (TITO) for helping us defend Zoo from a counter-liberation attack by a group of unidentified raiders (saw The Black Hawks, The New Inquisition, The Black Riders there), who tried and failed last night to take back Zoo from the native community.

Those who took part in the missions received these military ribbons (from left to right, Gargantuan, The Galaxy, Zoo):


What’s next on the agenda to discuss? Eh.. oh! The Monthly Awards have been released in The United Defenders League. Some repeat-winners included Riemstagrad for Triggerman of the Month and ABK for Recruiter of the Month, whilst Mahaj ran away with the Chief’s Award for his leadership shown during the unfortunately, unsuccessful refound of Concosia.

It was unfortunate that were unable to successful refound Concosia; nonetheless, in response to our liberation and attempted refound of Concosia, The New Inquisition has *finally* declared war with us. Like a distinctive growth of silver hair or the aging of fine wine, we accept this inevitable new stage of maturity as a defender organization with honour and grace.

Furthermore, the incident inspired me to commission the “Order of Danmark”, named after one of the natives of Concosia who bravely challenged the foreign occupation by The New Inquisition in their region. Members of the Order of Danmark shall be recognized in our Hall of Honour and shall receive this customary award:


Members of The Order of Danmark are natives of regions that have been threatened by foreign occupation. Natives are awarded this distinction by The United Defenders League for inspirational courage and resilience in the face of oppression. You can find a list of the first recipients of The Order of Danmark here.

Some final stuff on the agenda to discuss: Grays Harbour and Lochinver have be officially sworn in as our first, Master Craftsmans as apart of The United Defenders League’s new Artist’s Guild. Grays is a famous image-maker whose historical work includes the early mission ribbons used by the Texas Defense Forces. Nowadays he's now known more for his creation of stationary and currency images in Factbooks and National Information, in addition to being a beloved National Sovereignist in the WA General Assembly. Lochinver is a well-established image-maker in Global Economics and Trade who designed the format for Lyran Arms and Metix Digital’s storefronts; an incredible talent in the field of headers and miscellaneous image design which is on display in his storefront. We wish them the best of luck! The Artist’s Guild will be completing image requests for defenders, which may include flags for defender puppets, military ribbons, badges, seal and other assorted requests.

Also, Movie Night was a swashbuckling success (yarh!), with the crowd enjoying “Pirates of the Caribbean”. Next week, on July 14 2012 8:00 EDT, The United Defenders League will be hosting a screening of “The Dark Knight” in its IRC channel for Movie Night – all are welcome; this will hopefully prepare all those Bat-junkies for the Dark Knight Rises coming out the week after that.

Well I think that just covers about everything I wanted to cover this week, erm, defences, awards, TNI, artists and Batman. Yep.

Here’s your Moment of Zen:

<+Almaniania> Is there a udl.org, udl.net, udl.xxx, udl.com, udl.net?
<+Astrolinium> udl.xxx would be amazing.
<+Astrolinium> "Watch Unibot liberate Wordy with his large switcher for just $9.99/mo"
<Unibot> hhhhhhmmmm.
<@Milo> udl needs to start doing evony-esque ad campaigns, obv.
<@Milo> "Come and liberate, m'lord!"

May Justice Never Be Abandoned,
Disappointing that the NPA did not rate a mention.

We also have to thank our allies, The North Pacific Army, The Founderless Regions Alliance and The Royal Defence Force of United Kingdom for helping us liberate these regions and support these missions.

A Letter from the Capitalis de Societate of The United Defenders League,

<Milograd> What's going on?
<Solm> 6 Libs in a row is what's going on

Well said, Solm. Well said. The United Defenders League has been freeing regions left, right and centre with military victory after military victory these past few days. Last update, I spoke about our missions in Gargantuan, The Galaxy and Zoo – since then, Gargantuan has finally been cleaned of raiders after a weeklong post-liberation support mission. During the weekend, we successfully managed to juggle all of our support missions and leave The Black Riders and co. unable to try to “re-raid” Zoo or Gargantuan. This left one newbie Black Rider upset as he stormed out of Gargantuan as soon as it updated and declared on the Black Riders’ Regional Message Board:

Amusing as that was, there are more successes to talk about from this week. The United Defenders League also liberated Senatus Populusque Romanus that same day from under the noses of The Greater German Reich. Oh.. and I guess ze Nazis didn’t like zat, so they tried to raid it again last night – unfortunately for them the Greenwood Band was active and shot down their raid with a quick defense lead by Sr. Merryman Jamie, Mewsland and Soviet Canuckistan. Nice one boys!

Then the next day, The United Defenders League and The North Pacific Army ambushed raiders in St. Abbaddon to liberate it in a close, 15-13 victory against The Black Hawks and The Black Riders plus Unknown and our good erm… friends, The New Inquisition, and The Land of Kings and Emperors who were providing support. We made this liberation look easy, but liberators were facing an active raider delegate in St Abbaddon who only managed to eject and ban two soldiers during the liberation (poor Lep and Sov!). Also, a big shout out goes to New Warsaw Pact and Empire of Andrew for helping us during the Post-Liberation support stage!

Perhaps the most amusing part about the St Abbaddon mission was Lieutenant Mahaj, liberating St Abbaddon with a puppet emerging from The New Inquisition, flying The New Inquisition flag. The New Inquisition has yet to declare war on Mahaj, but I fear a speech or lecture on the subject of vexillological thievery is in the works.

But wait! There’s *more*! If you call now you ca—well there is more, The United Defenders League also liberated Former United States from The Black Riders; in a strong showing for a Monday morning, thirteen Merrymen rode into the region in the three second window of opportunity provided to elegantly take the delegacy from the Raiders and return said authority back to the native community safely. There were no ejections or bans of defenders during the mission.

Participants in these various liberations received the following military ribbons:


A shout out goes out to Milograd who was lead in the Former United States liberation – coincidentally, Former United States is officially his first mission back as an active defender since he retired last month. Milograd recently retook the Scarlet Oath and we’re all extremely happy to have our organization’s Guardian back on the team with his fisticuffs ready. He received a warm welcome back from his fellow defenders. Likewise, we also welcomed back Jamie Anumia back to The United Defenders League too! Jamie has returned to defending and has already been kicking butt with defences and liberations, even leading the liberation of Senatus Populusque Romanus!

On the subject of new members, we’ve gotten many new members over the past week. We’re welcoming some new additions to our team including, Denecaep, former WA Delegate of Azhukali and founder of the NS World Censuses, Euskirribakondara, whose World Hit Festival has been a smashing hit in NationStates, Laos Refugees, former infiltrator of NAZI EUROPE, Phonencia of Capitalist Paradise, Raymond Sullivan of United Kingdom, The Kingdom of Okwe of West Africa, Morlago of Region IRC, Novus Niciae of Balder avid roleplayers: Nui-ta, Camelza, Remad, Grand Britannia, Deneager, Segmentia, Vecherd, Veladio, Sheepish, Sanian Confederacy, Alternate Universe 912, Vudnia, Kingborough, Veceria, Vettrera, Methoria, Immoren, Socialist republic of Andrew, founder of Republic of Andrew and his regional colleague, Mlewta!

Furthermore, Lochinver, our Master Craftsman, has been incredibly busy! At the beginning of the week, he designed seals for all our organization’s various departments. He also designed the new banner and images involved with this letter, which you may have noticed are new and shiny. Lochinver was appointed our Master Craftsman in our new Artist’s Guild, his storefronts, Lochinver Ordnance, are highly reputable.

OH! AND REMEMBER! Movie Night is on July 14 2012 8:00 EDT in #udl on Espernet. We’ll be opening up our private military channel for the public to watch “The Dark Knight”. I hope to see you there!

Here’s your Moment of Zen:

<Ananke> eh, I'm not sure there's a correct way to pronounce it. I just say it the way you'd do it in Danish. *shrugs*
<@Unibot> Ah-ne-kay with a pause before ne.
<@Unibot> Pretty sure.
<Ananke> A-nan-ke I'd say
<Johz> I'm giving up and pronouncing it 'Geoff'.

A Letter from the Capitalis de Societate of The United Defenders League,

A relatively quiet week admittedly since much of our staff has been away on vacations and holidays during the summer lull – I myself type this letter to you from erm *looks at the road signs* Boxboro, Massachusetts.

In Boston, I had a particularly fun get-together with Earth22 (also known as Lyanna Stark), Pharaoh of Osiris; Eluvatar, Chief of Intelligence of the United Defenders League and Delegate of the North Pacific; Evil Wolf (also known as “Blue Wolf”), Former Khan of the Lone Wolves United and infamous trouble-maker; Gulliver, speaker of the North Pacific; and R3naissanc3r, Royal Penguin and renowned member of The New Inquisition and Land of Kings and Emperors among many other regions. Some highlights included Eluvatar practicing his reconnaissance skills and sneaking up on Earth and I on the train-platform (GODDAMIT ELU!), contemplating pushing Evil Wolf off a cliff to improve UDL-TITO relations (deep down inside, you know I love you, EW :P) and handing out UDL T-Shirts to Earth and Eluvatar (but *not* R3naissanc3r because we came to the conclusion that would count as treason with The New Inquisition unless he burnt the shirt as an effigy). A big shout out to Eluvatar for planning the day – it was incredibly fun and I think we all enjoyed it a lot, I know I did.


Four out of five of us from the get-together.

A UDL T-Shirt

What’s a UDL T-Shirt, you ask? I had shirts made in the UDL colours and customized with our insignia and have steadily been delivering them to some of our senior members. I know Senior Merryman Quadrimmina was the first to receive his shirt in the mail and called himself a “happy customer”. Nonetheless, I didn’t think anyone outside of the organization would want a shirt for the UDL, but if you do, telegram Unibot II about it and we’ll talk about options.

Anyways, in administrative news: congratulations to Mewsland on his appointment as Vice Chief of Orientation – I had heard quite a bit about his training abilities and patience and we felt it was time to make it official. As Vice Chief of Orientation, Mewsland will be busy! The Chieftaincy of Orientation announced on July 27 that there is a new “Certificate of Merit” to recognize defenders who have received basic training in the field of defending. All senior merrymen and officers have had their certificate, rubber-stamped; but from now on, one’s first few weeks in the Greenwood Band will involve demonstrating to the Chieftaincy of Orientation that one knows the basics!

Furthermore, the Chieftaincy of Orientation will be very busy with all the new prospective recruits that will be flooding in with the new recruitment program. It’s been announced that for every four recruits that a member gets to join, said member gets a star – if a member gets five stars, they will be recognized with the Order of the Golden Arrow as a Knight to be addressed by “Sir” or “Dame”. I am gunning to be the first member of the Order, I recruited enough for my first star a few nights ago but Belschaft is slowly catching up to me from the rear!

On that note, The United Defenders League welcomes back the always lovely, Earth22 (also known as Lyanna Stark) to the Greenwood Band after she amusingly rejoined with my forum account by accident (I had been using her computer) – thus starting off a funny dialogue on the forums. The League also happily welcomes Abbey Anumia, Mesoland and Astarial, as well as Subject X7, Zarkenis Ultima, The Drone Empire, Tehraan, Discoveria, Bajireyn, Westfolde, The United Kingdom of Poland, Kritarchy Kolumbes, Zaras, Belhorizon, Embassy Lords and Mertado!

Likewise, we’re very honoured to welcome The Freestates, The Western Reaches and Imagey Nation (who was commended by the Security Council for his renowned “If you want a seal or logo” thread) to The United Defenders League’s Artist Guild which has been a smashing success thus far – I know of several private image requests that have been satisfied by the Guild and I’ve recently signed off on a project by image-making rockstars, The Western Reaches and Lochinver to improve the design of the forum – I’m excited to see the results. To get a feel for The Western Reaches’s work, I’d take a look at the incredible poster he made for The United Defenders League recently.

UDL Master Craftsman, Lochinver takes matters into his own hand when a troll joins #udl.
* General_Tyler was kicked by Unibot (BYE!)
<+AdmiralMew|Karma> Thank you, Unibot
<@Unibot> That was for his own security.
<@Unibot> Not ours :P
<+Lochinver> we were about to make him use MS Paint
<@Unibot> Oh gawd

As for military successes, it’s been a slow week but I know there was a successful defense in African Union and liberations in The Alliance of Ogrefasz, Great White Brotherhood, The Plain of Scamander, The Islamic Republic of Iran, Actiunedon, The Dominion of Satan and a liberation in done with the Royal British Isles Navy in New Confederacy of Sovereign Nations. Also, the Post-Liberation mission in Zoo is *finally* over, since the password has been changed as per native wishes to keep the region in “lockdown” – we wish the native community well there!

Bribery at its finest.
<@Unibot> Also you guys should know..
<@Unibot> If you get this one
<@Unibot> You get a military ribbon
<@Unibot> :P
<@Unibot> So everybody stay up!
<Nullarni> Ribbons! Huzzah!
<+Astrolinium> But, Uni... I don't have enough hair to put in /another/ ribbon. :P
<+Nationstatelandsville> Can I show this ribbon to children and scream "F*** YOU, BRATS, I WAS IN A WAR!"

Some final stuff to bring up,

The Monthly Awards for The United Defenders League are up! Congratulations to the recipients of the awards.

And lastly, The United Defenders League says farewell to Milograd on his “indefinite sabbatical” from NationStates. Milograd, former Chief Lieutenant and our institution’s Guardian, has touched all of us in the Greenwood Band with his innocent, heart-warming demeanor and his dark humor – he will be greatly missed.

In honour of Milograd, your Moment of Zen is:

<@Milograd> Jaywalking should be a capital crime
<@Milograd> Just to show those people who think they can get away with it.
<@Mahaj> lol
<+Jenrak> The world will be derived of photogenic white women, Milograd.
<+Jenrak> You will plunge the planet into a darker era.
<@Milograd> Truly.