What Would Harry Do?

IndieGirl

TNPer
TNP Nation
IndieGirl
What's something a Harry Potter character will never say?

For example:

Harry: ...I am the boy who scored.
Ginny: Not too high either. *wink wink*
Ron: ...ew.


Ron: Wanna pretend our wands are light sabers?
Harry: Dude.


Voldemort: Harry...I am...your father... *heavy breathing*
Harry: Noooooooooooooo!
 
Harry: You know, I think we should listen to our elders, let's just stay here and play wizard chess. Leave the possibly dangerous stuff to more capable people.
 
Professor Snape: I admit it, Potter. I was wrong about you. You're amazing. May I be your surrogate godfather? Would you like a chocolate frog?

Ron: Mmmm...I had the yummiest dream about McGonagall last night.

Minerva McGonagall: Is that your wand, Ronald, or are you happy to see me?
 
Minerva: Professor Flitwick! Is that a skimpy negligee you're wearing?! AND IS THAT LIPSTICK?!?!
Flitwick: I can explain everything! I swear! *accidentally drops his nylons in a fluster*
 
Harry: Hey, Ron! Guess who I shagged last night?
Ron: ...
Harry: Your sister!
Ron: ...
Harry: Man, is she tight! And ohhh! She does this great little trick with her tongue where she--
Ron: *noose*
 
Lord Voldermort: Now, Potter, I have you in my clutches! At last!

Harry: You'll never win Volders!

Volders: *sighs* I know..you know being the most feared wizard in the universe isnt all scars and dragons you know. Sometimes it gets quite lonely....no-one talks to me..

The H-ster: I know exactly what you mean..

Both fall into each others arms crying
 
Dumbledore: I probably shouldn't be telling you this Harry, but I have foreseen my own death!
Harry: Gasp. I thought you would live forever!
Dumbledore: So did I Harry, but soon it will be my time. Before I go I must give you this crucial piece of advice that will save you one day. Use a condom.
Harry: But that doesn't really matter, what about Voldemort!?
Dumbledore: Exactly *dies*
 
Harry to Ron: Its a shame, Cho could have been a celebrity overnight. *starts whistling Twista's - Celebrity Overnight*
 
Harry: You're a werewolf?
Lupin: Yes.
Harry: Are you f***ing serious?
Lupin: Yes, that too.
Harry: What?
Lupin: Oops, said too much.
 
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