[SC - Defeated] Commend Varanius

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Commend Varanius
Category: Commendation | Target: Varanius
Proposed by: Chef Big Dog, Co-authored by: A Bloodred Moon | Onsite Topic


Commend Varanius

Declaring to this august body that, throughout its 14 year history, Varanius has been at the forefront of some of the multiverse’s greatest deeds, and believing it criminal that these feats of heroism have gone unnoticed;

Recognizing Varanius’ humble beginnings as a General Assembly Author, which, while slightly embarrassing, is still highly deserving of praise. During this time, they were known for their great works such as:

  • General Assembly Resolution #1346 “Protecting the Rights of Bees”, where, after years of tyrannical oppression by so-called “beekeepers” Varanius brought to light the terrible crimes committed against this noble species, and urging the Word Assembly to protect wasps.
  • General Assembly Resolution #3 “On the Proper Handling of Snails”, performing a vital task to the international community that this body unfortunately lacks the space to elaborate upon, but which this proposal would seek to stress is essential to the existence of the World Assembly.


In awe that, upon Varanius’ exit of the General Assembly, their first step into the wider world involved them single-handedly defeating the armies of the Black Hawks in the liberation of the Pacific on February 31st, 1999. Varanius’ heroic actions saved the region from assured destruction in the nick of time;

Grateful for Varanius’ monumental and earth-shattering work in Europeia, including, but not limited to:

  • Introducing “columns” to the Europeian Broadcasting Corporation, which broke new ground in Europeia’s long history and was definitely unique.
  • Having existed in Europeia. At all.


Admiring the fact that Varanius did NOT, at any point, extort the North Pacific for World Assembly votes (as far as the World Assembly is aware), a standard that other regional allies and partners of that esteemed region, including some commended by this august body, have tragically failed to maintain;

Praising Varanius for their work as a staunch Defender of regional sovereignty; chief among these deeds was their tenure as arch-chancellor of the Founderless Regions Alliance from 2009-2018, leading monumental defensive efforts such as the defense of various unimportant regions against an invasion force of Europeians, orchestrated by a mysterious but high-ranked official in the West Pacific; or their efforts in exposing the security flaws in Realm of the Whispering Winds without damaging the region;

Appreciative of Varanius’ awesome contributions to a project, which sadly cannot be elaborated upon due to security concerns; the World Assembly, however, is confident that [REDACTED] was for the good of the international community;

Impressed with Varanius’ contributions to culture. As Varanius is highly cultured, their foreign envoys have labored tirelessly to share these aforementioned cultural masterpieces far and wide, from the fabled land of 10000 Islands to the halls of Lone Wolves United, eternalized in the famous “pins” of these esteemed and respected allies;

Thankful for Varanius’ contributions to the East Pacific’s legislature, during which they undertook titanic efforts to prevent the region from declaring itself illegal, efforts which tragically failed. This Council blames the GA as per usual;

Hereby commends Varanius.
Note: Only votes from TNP WA nations and NPA personnel will be counted. If you do not meet these requirements, please add (non-WA) or something of that effect to your vote.
Voting Instructions:
  • Vote For if you want the Delegate to vote For the resolution.
  • Vote Against if you want the Delegate to vote Against the resolution.
  • Vote Abstain if you want the Delegate to abstain from voting on this resolution.
  • Vote Present if you are personally abstaining from this vote.
Detailed opinions with your vote are appreciated and encouraged!


ForAgainstAbstainPresent
3903
 
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Overview
This proposal is a literal joke designed to commend Varanius (Vara) based on a number of false assertions. It begins by citing Vara's supposed authorship of two resolutions which do not exist -- GA #3 "On the Proper Handling of Snails" and GA #1346 "Protecting the Rights of Bees". It then cites his supposed contribution to a liberation of the Pacific in 1999 (before NationStates was even created), before going on to various other supposed acts by the nominee, such as serving as Arch-Chancellor of the Founderless Regions Alliance from 2009 to 2018 (despite that organisation organisation in fact disbanding in 2016). Finally, the resolution states that Vara has made posts in various regions' Discord servers which have been pinned thereto; and engaged in "titanic efforts to prevent [The East Pacific] from declaring itself illegal".

Recommendation
To be perfectly clear, this proposal is not funny. It makes a series of patently untrue assertions, while somehow failing to be amusing or otherwise endearing. While Vara may be deserving of a serious commendation or condemnation, we cannot support the passage of such frivolity.

For the above reasons, the Ministry of World Assembly Affairs recommends a vote Against the at-vote SC resolution, "Commend Varanius".
 
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Finally, proposal authors you can trust who are in this For Your Protection. For (non-WA).
 
Well this just isn't even true. The WA Ministry should put in for a sense of humour transplant.
That's not our job, though. We give honest and constructive information about each proposal, and our IFVs are meant to be taken seriously. Funny or not, we have to do what we have to do.
 
That's not our job, though. We give honest and constructive information about each proposal, and our IFVs are meant to be taken seriously. Funny or not, we have to do what we have to do.
The IFV is neither honest nor constructive. Nothing in the recommendation is constructive. It makes several subjective statements that I would not say were honest. And thus I find it hard to take seriously. So really it fails on all three of the criteria you listed.

Like I said, the WA Ministry should put in for a sense of humour transplant. The WASC isn't that deep, and frivolity has a place. The ministry seems to have forgotten that and that's a shame, because it devalues their work.
 
I can assure you that the statements that the proposal is unfunny, etc reflect the honest belief of the Ministry. Arguing that they are in bad faith (which they are not) is literally the only grounds under which one can describe this kind of subjective statement as not "honest".
 
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