Old Willy's Pub
Present day
"You look like you've seen a ghost, Andy!" Will says, looking at me, jokingly.
He's right. My face is pale and my expression exudes both embarrassment and hurt.
I try to recompose myself with another sip of that brown liquor. That manages to do the trick and allows me to continue the story: "So anyway... mom and dad got married later that year. They had their honeymoon at Marathon. That's where the story I promised you really begins."
"Ah, Marathon. That is the best place in our little bit of space." Will quips.
"Yeah. Warm and tropical. Mom and dad ended up buying a summer home there." I pause in reflection. "I've heard that blending a family is difficult, but.. for a time, everything was perfect. Really, everything. Ava and I went to school together every morning. We were inseparable. It was like this for a couple of years."
"Are we getting to the part where you fucked everything up?" Will asks me, his eyebrow rising in anticipation.
"Let me get to that please." I respond.
"So as luck would have it, a sick day was what first came between Avalon and I."
"Fuck, finally, we're getting somewhere." Will says, exasparated.
"Gosh, you need to practice patience." I respond
Aversville, Tuolovi
Fourteen years ago
"Get up or you'll be late for school!" Mom told me.
"I really feel terrible, mom." I said to her.
"And you are absolutely sure this doesn't have anything to do with Templar Warrior Three coming out yesterday?" she responded, raising her had to feel my forehead.
"Why won't you believe me, mom?" I asked in response, before continuing "I really feel bad this time, mom!"
"Mother's intuition? Convenient timing? Not my first day on the mommy job? You certainly don't seem feverish." mom responded, before continuing: "But I will measure it." putting a thermometer under my tongue before leaving briefly.
"Haha, this is my chance!" I thought, smiling. I quickly put the tip of the thermometer against the hot lamp on my nightstand. As I heard mom coming back, I quickly returned it to my mouth.
"Hmm. Maybe you are sick." she said, examining the thermometer. "Fine, you can stay home, but you better rest. No Templar Warrior Three, understood?"
"Yes, mom." I replied.
"Good. I'll see you this evening. Love you!"
"Love you too mom!"
As soon as everyone was gone, I of course fired up Templar Warrior Three and had a day of hardcore gaming. I was sitting near the kitchen window making a sandwich when I heard Ava come back, with a couple of girls. I felt a little bad, but I decided to listen in.
"...because he was sick today, Anne!" I heard my sister yell.
"I'm just saying, it's strange that you spend so much time with him. Wasn't it fun today, just us girls?" I heard an unfamiliar voice. Must be Anne I thought.
"Sure, I guess..." I heard Avalon concede.
"What's your problem with Andy anyway?" I heard another voice interject. That had to be Mads.
"You never talk about my brother like this."
"Because you don't follow him around like a lost puppy!"
"I don't follow Andy around like a lost puppy!" I heard Avalon defend herself.
I sat there, in the kitchen, with thoughts swirling around. Was that what people really thought?
"You don't see it, but everyone else does. People say you're the weird new girl crushing on her step-brother."
"Leave her alone! Nobody says that!" I heard Mads interject in Ava's defence."
"You just haven't heard it because you don't have the right friends. She's never going to fit in if she doesn't ditch her loser brother."
Anna's a spoiled brat, but she's popular was the thought going through my mind. This was Ava's first year after all. I already have a bunch of friends but she only has Mads, I thought. Maybe Anne's right, Ava's never going to be able to make new friends if I'm always in the way. I felt a flash of jealousy, hurt, and anger zap through me. Just as suddenly as it came, it was gone, replaced by quiet resolve.
"I know what I have to do." I said to myself, quietly.
A few minutes later, Avalon walked in, while I was playing Templar Warrior Three , of course.
"Whatcha' playing?" she asked me.
"Templar Warrior Three: Enhanced Combat."
"Let's team up!" she said, enthusiastically.
"I.. I was just finishing up. Pa-Dad asked me to do some chores anyway. You go ahead." I said, handing her the controller.
"But... Andy?" I heard her say as I walked out of the room.
The Next Morning...
"Hey, mom, have you seen Andy?" Ava asked.
"Yeah, he just left for school a couple of minutes ago."
"He was supposed to wait for me!" Ava replied, a tinge of annoyance, and sadness in her voice.
"I thought he did sweetie, you two always walk to school together." mom said, surprised.
"He did it last night too! I think Andy is mad at me for something." Ava replied, pools of water forming at the bottom of her eyes.
"Have you talked to him about it?"
"I tried to, but he keeps making excuses to leave."
"Dad and I will talk to him at bedtime to see what's going on. Does that sound okay?" mom asked.
"I guess..." Ava paused for a second. "I just don't know what I did wrong."
Later that day...
"Hey buddy, how'd ya feel at school today?" dad asked me.
"I felt a lot better but mom still has me on bed rest." I said in response.
"Prove it! Let's see some parkour moves Andy!"
"Watch this!" I said, jumping over my bed. Dad chuckled.
"You're a natural." he said, as mom walked into the room.
"I can't wait to do that class!" I said, excitedly.
"We'll see about that. If your report card is good enough."
"Oh it will be!"
"Say, Andy, Ava is pretty upset that you left for school this morning without her." mom began.
"Is there something going on between you two?" dad asked.
"Well... no." I mumbled for a moment before continuing. "It's dumb. Promise you won't be mad?"
"We promise we'll listen." mom said, alleviating my fears a little.
"So why don't you tell us what's going on?" she contimued.
"I... I overheard Anna telling Ava that she wouldn't make any friends."
"Kids say mean things all the time. Sticks and stones..." dad said, pausing for a moment. "Why'd you let Anna get under your skin?"
"Anna said it's because Ava follows me around like a lost puppy." I paused for a second "At first I was pissed-"
"Language!" I heard my mother interrupt.
"...Angry, but I think she might be kinda right. I don't want Ava to get picked on." I pause for a moment, to try to not give away the sadness inside me. "I.. I'm just giving her a little space so she can make other friends."
"That's... very grown up of a boy your age..." dad said, before continuing: "She's certainly been spending a lot of time with you. Still, this doesn't feel like the right way to change that."
I could tell from the way mom was looking at me, she saw through my brave front.
"I don't like this either..." mom paused for a second "...but at the same time I feel you both are missing out by not cultivating other friendships."
"I don't want to hurt her feelings. She just needs a little push." I said.
"We'll talk to her, but this is not your problem to fix. I'm not even sure if it's a problem to begin with. Andy, please be careful not to push too hard." dad told me.
"We'd hate to see anything come between you two. We've loved watching you two connect." mom followed up.
"I won't, mom." I told her.
Old Willy's Pub
Present day
I sigh. My expression is sad and broken.
"I take it with that sour expression that Paul's instincts were correct?" Will asks me.
"Y-yeah. Ava was furious with me when she found out what I was doing." I respond, looking at my drink.
"This might be the one time that mom and dad miscalculated." I continue, my expression fixed to my drink.
"How so?" Will asks, inquistively.
"Ava took it as a personal betrayal. That's when I really learned how competitive she could be." I say, raising my head to meet Will's gaze.
"Did you try to talk to her?" Will asks, in a tender voice.
"Yeah, of course! You know how it is..." I lower my head towards the drink again. "Whether you talk about it or not, it is still a mistake."
"Sounds an awful lot like you're describing marriage, Andy."
I snort.
"So yeah she never walked to school with me again."
"That sounds pretty extreme for avoiding her a couple of times." Will says, a little doubt seeping out of his voice.
"It was never about avoiding her..." I pause for a moment, looking at the wooden ceiling. "She would have forgiven me for just about anything, except for cutting her out of decisions that affected her apparently..." I say, a pang of regret in my voice.
"Still sounds like we're talking marriage here."
I chuckle. Will always finds a way to cheer me up a little.
"As misguided as I was, it worked. She made a bunch of new friends." I take a drink. "Ahhh... With Ava doing other things, my focus also changed. I gave up video games... mostly. I loved parkour class. Got pretty good at it too! Then Paul convinced me to do youth football."
"Ah, handegg. I used to watch clips of your games with Paul. We thought you'd go pro at one point." Will says, with a little pride in his voice.
"I enjoyed football, but it was never going to be my passion. I had the agility, but not the speed or size to go pro."
"When the fuck'd you get so humble? Training son, you would have gotten there! You had that dog in you."
"I guess we'll never know. But to answer your original question... I guess I always got mixed signals from Avalon." I say, pausing to reflect for a moment. "She'd turn her back to me at home, but then show up to all of my games. Like religiously. Rain or shine." I say, meeting Will's gaze again.
"Even mom and dad had to miss out an occasional match. When I was at football camp, she'd feed my fish without being asked. On our birthday, she always left a nice gift on my bed."
"You had better left one on hers too!" Will says, with a joking anger.
He once again squeezes a chuckle out of me.
"Give me a little credit Will... I'm not stupid." I respond.
"Good, just making sure." Will retorts.
"Moving on... our antagonism was the hardest on mom and dad." I say, sadly, lowering my head towards the drink again. "They always thought they were at fault for messing up a good thing. Or.. at least not stopping me messing up a good thing." I continue
"Well, all of this sounds like she blew it waaay out of proportion." Will tells me, reassuringly.
"As I said, I was far from perfect." I respond.
Aversville, Tuolovi
Ten years ago
I knocked on Ava's door.
"Come in." I heard from behind the door.
I opened the door to find Ava writing something.
"Hey sis, mom wants to talk to you." I said, gingerly.
"What about?" she asked.
"I'm not sure. She was on the phone with Miss Adama talking about a babysitting gig earlier. That might be it." I said.
She sighed, before saying: "Tell her I'm busy. I'll be out in a bit."
"What are you doing?" I asked her, before following up "Is that a diary?"
"What it's not is any of your business, Andy." she quipped.
I decided to try an olive branch.
"You know, dad talked me into keeping a journal too. It's the only way I found that works to organise all of my practices." I said.
Avalon raised her head from the diary for the first time this entire conversation. I could detect the slightest hint of a smile, before it was gone, and her eyes were back on the diary.
"Is that all? Mom asked you to pass along a message, which you have done. Leave." she said, with a lot of attitude in her voice. I couldn't understand what was going on in her head. Maybe if I could get my hands on that diary though, was my first thought. I wouldn't be long until I got that chance.
Three days later...
"Leaving sis? Say it ain't so..." I said, with an obvious twinge of sarcasm
"I'll be babysitting Lee and Kara, if anyone asks." she said, completely seriously in response.
"Why would anyone ask?" I pulled out my full prick mode.
She audibly sighed before saying "Such an ass..."
"Thanks! The extra squats really have been worth it, huh?"
What followed was a disgusted and probably deserved sigh from Ava. That was still a funny joke though.
"I don't know why I even try..." she said.
"Enjoy your cartoon marathon and cleaning up goldfish crackers!" I clapped back.
Ava stayed quiet this time, so of course I had to push a little further.
"Oh hey, Ava, did Lee and Kara cry when they found out you were the babysitter?" I said, with the biggest shiteating grin on my face.
"No, but I do sometimes, when I remember you're my brother." she said, flashing her middle finger at me from behind. The front door slammed soon thereafter.
It was go time. I went into her room, looking for that notebook. There weren't exactly many hiding spots. The room was spotless. I found it behind the big stuffed bear. it was way too easy. I quickly set myself up on the couch, diary in hand. "What is going on in that ginger head of hers..." I said, quietly, opening it up.
It began about six months ago. I'd decided that I had time, so I would go through it from the start.
"Well it finally started. Mads' started when she was 12 and I have been jealous all the time." My eyebrow rose. Was she talking about what I thought she was talking about?
"It was so embarrassing, and there was nothing else I could do, I had to go to the nurse's office." YUCK, nope nope nope. I instantly regretted picking up the diary, but decided to soldier on, skipping past a little, until something caught my eye.
"Sleepover at Mads', this could be interesting..." I said, quietly.
"I spent the night at Mads' place. She invited me over for a "Kosol" binge but instead we just ended up talking. Her dad had some wine so I ended up having a couple glasses. I'm not sure I liked the taste, but I liked that it made me feel relaxed. Afterwards, Mads asked me what I would think about her asking Andy out."
"Whaaaaaa..." I muttered, quietly.
"It's the first time I've ever lied to Mads. I said I'd be fine with it but now I feel sick. She's so beautiful, if she wants him, she'll get him."
"Well, she is beautiful, but she's not really my type. Do I even have a type?" I muttered to myself again.
"After Andy and I drifted apart, I'd share-" There was something heavily crossed out "stuff with her."
"Huh, what?" I muttered yet again.
"We haven't talked about it in a while, but that doesn't mean I've changed. I think Mads knew I was lying because she dropped it pretty quick. But if not Mads, then someone else eventually. How will I feel about that? Maybe it's better if it's Mads and not a total stranger. At least she knows my secrets and will consider my-" something was heavily crossed out again. "opinions. All I know is this sick feeling won't go away."
"Wait, does Ava like me like that? Nah I get her, I'd feel weird about her dating as well. Not because I'm into her or anything. I'm just... protective of my sister. Right?" I muttered yet again.
"Another entry from two weeks ago. This is from that tournament game." I muttered, turning the page.
"Another Saturday watching my brother play this stupid game. Mom and dad went home at halftime to prepare the victory party."
"That was a good game. I scored five touchdowns." I muttered, rolling my eyes.
"Andy took a hard hit in the third quarter. It was a dirty tackle. He got pulled down by his facemask. It was that asshole Michael Toretto from West Side High again."
"That was shady as shit. He was talking smack to me the entire game." I muttered once more.
"My heart stopped when I saw him not moving. Finally, Andy gave a thumbs up and I could breathe again. That's when I felt something snap in me. When Michael was on the bench, I slipped over to the visiting team section. When nobody was looking, I squeezed a whole tube of JointFreeze ointment into his helmet."
"She did what?" I muttered yet again.
"He put that helmet on after the next turnover but wasn't on the field long. Some JointFreeze got into his eyes and he tried to run to the locker room yelling for a medic, but he ran into the girl's lockers by mistake and got manhandled by the cheer coach."
"That was her? That was fucking hilarious!" I quietly said.
"Nobody hurts my-" something is crossed out but legible "Andy family."
"I had no idea she was even paying attention. She never says anything to me, win or lose." I said, quietly once more.
"I wanted to run up and hug him after the game. I was so proud of worried for him, I wish he could see it."
"Ugh, this is starting to feel bad. Maybe I should put her diary back. There is a page ripped out... I could read the impressions..." I said, quietly.
"No. If she felt strongly enough to destroy this page, then she can keep this secret. I'm already going to hell for what I've read. I have a lot to think about. I'm not sure if returning the diary now will keep me from being a total piece of shit, but it's the only card I have left." I thought out loud. Before I could stand up, I heard an ear-piercing scream.
"WHAT THE FUCK?!"
"Whaa..."
"IS THAT MY DIARY?! Andy, were you snooping in my room?" Ava's voice seethed with a menace I'd never heard from her before.
I tried to awkwardly scramble off the couch in a futile attempt to escape.
"Not today, asshole!" she yelled, as the world cartwheeled. It was a familiar sensation, being dive tackled. This time without pads. This was going to hurt.
As the pain subsided, though, I came face to face with her. She was.. beautiful. Her scent filled my nose.
"Give it back Andy!"
"I- I dropped it."
Old Willy's Pub
Present day
"Kids poke into each other's private stuff all the time. I could see her being pissed at you for violating her privacy, but..." Will pauses for a moment "...it's hard to imagine her staying mad at you for long."
"Yeah, well... there was some stuff in there she really wanted to keep private." I respond, smirking.
"Oh, like her batting for the other team, perhaps?" Will asks.
"Whaaaaa..." I respond, taken aback.
"Don't give me that look! That blonde girl at your graduation party!" Will looks at me. My expression remains dumbfounded. "Oh come on! Everyone with a working pair of eyes could see they were more than friends."
"I- I wouldn't know anything about that, Will." I respond, seriously.
"Yeah, yeah keep your secrets." Will jabs at me.
"So what, five years until graduation, right?" he brings us back on topic.
"After the diary incident, yeah." I respond.
"I'm starting to see why you were afraid of running out of time today..." Will pauses for a moment. "So was it a hot war now or still a cold war?" He asks, curiously.
I take a moment to think, before responding: "Both at the same time, to be honest. One day I'd come home to see she'd washed my football uniform and laid it out for me." I pause. "A week later I'd wake up to her dunking my hand in a warm bowl of water. I guess she'd read somewhere that'd make me piss the bed."
"You're shitting me!" Will exclaims, aghast.
"Nope." I respond, earnestly, meeting his gaze.
"Well, DID you?" he asks, shocked.
"Did I what?" I respond with a question, trying to deflect from a very embarrassing situation.
"Piss the bed?" Will asks.
I cough uncomfortably. "Anyway, those provocations did not go unanswered."
Will is silent but his look displays both gratification and shock.
"I'd replace the rolls of toilet paper in her bathroom with duct tape." I say before pausing for a moment to recall a memory. "Once she started driving, I hid her keys in a flower pot in the den one morning."
Will's face shows a flash of realisation. "Yeah, this is all starting to make sense to me now." he says.
"I left clues for her to find them but she still missed school that day." I continue.
"These are pretty typical pranks though." Will says, astutely.
"Yeah, they got progressively meaner though." I say, as my face suddenly displays a look of sadness again.
"We were both just waiting for the other to cross a line that couldn't be uncrossed..." I say, pausing for a moment with a look of pure guilt and regret on my face. "Mom and dad tried their best to play peacemaker. They almost pulled it off."
"With that rueful look on your face though, I don't think I have to guess who crossed that line." Will says, genuinely.
I sigh and cover my eyes with my hand.
"Ahhh." Will just lets out.
"The graduation party blowup had actually been brewing for a few weeks beforehand. You remember, I played baseball the last two years of high school. Just like my football games, no matter how things were between us, Avalon was always there in the stands." I say, looking at my drink, with a whole bunch of guilt and regret coming over me again.
"She was in track right? Did you go to her track meets or was this sports loyalty one sided?" Will asks me an honest question.
"Yeah, she was in girl's handball and winter track. And yeah I was always there, though I tried to keep a low profile. She probably knew I was there anyway."
"I mean this in the kindest possible way kid, but you're an idiot." Will suddenly says.
"What? What makes you say that?" I ask.
"Do the math! Your sister only chose sports that didn't conflict with yours! Whatever you think was going on between the two of you at the time, she loved you. Like really loved you!" Will tells me, exasperated.
"Thanks, Colonel Hindsight." I respond, in a serious tone.
Will and I let a moment of silence hang between us before I decide to continue. I took most of that time to compose myself again, having been on the verge of tears.
"So there were three games left in the season. We were playing Vreysterburg. I hit one on the ground past the shortstop, and turned a hard double into a triple. I looked up into the stands to find Ava, but she wasn't paying attention."
"Homework?" Will asks, genuinely.
"No. Some guy had sat down next to her and she was chatting with him." I answer.
"Pretty girl sitting by herself gets attention! Nooooooooooo..."
"Go fuck yourself... If I'm being completely honest, I was a little jealous." I pause for a minute to collect my thoughts. "I didn't realise how much I counted on her quiet support up until that moment. I also had a bad feeling about the guy. He seemed... beneath her."
"Like lower class?" Will asks, jokingly.
"No, nothing like that. He just came off as a player. As far as I knew, Avalon had never even dated a guy. I guess I figured she'd be more picky when she finally did." I answer.
"Protectiveness and jealousy are an ugly combo, son." Will says, seriously.
"Yeah... and it only got worse." I respond, my expression turning into one full of sadness again.
"They came to my next game together. Every time I looked at her, she was huddled next to this guy talking. Or they'd be head to head laughing at something on her phone." I say, ruefully.
"Was he from your school, you know anything about him?" Will asks me.
"He was from the same school yeah. Jaden Crossfield was the name. I knew of him but only by reputation. He had this sort of angsty rebel thing going on. Getting into fights, breaking rules, that sort of thing. Wore lots of black, had an old ass pre-fall car. We didn't run in the same circles so he wasn't really on my dradis until then."
"Oh, it was that guy!" Will says, making a realisation.
"Yeah, and he was putting in the moves on my sister. I was so focused on them, I struck out twice and missed an easy catch in the seventh." I say, thinking back, with eyes full of sadness and regret.
"And this is when you crossed the line?" Will asks me, eyebrow raised in anticipation.
"No." I tell him. I take a moment's pause. It becomes an uncomfortable silence as I swing between telling him everything and keeping it to myself. I finally decide to tell him.
"Will. What I'm about to tell you is very personal to me. I want you to understand why the graduation party went down like that." I say, looking him in the eyes, serious look on my face.
"...Kid, if you don't want to talk about it-" I cut Will off.
"No. This is at the centre of everything that happened after." I sigh. "So it was the final game of the season... my last game as a student really. And it was the regional championship game against New Market."
"Tough school." Will quips.
"Yeah, we knew the odds... but things didn't shake out the way anyone expected. During the pre-game pep-talk I looked for my sister in the bleachers. She was nowhere to be found. Will, I cannot describe what I felt in that moment." I fall silent for a moment, as the memory washes over me. The wound is almost as fresh as it was back then. "Every game from the day we met up until then she'd been there."
"Maybe she took a page from your playbook and was keeping a low profile?" Will asks, trying to console me.
"No. I knew she was off with Jaden somewhere." I say, my head sinking towards my drink again.
"Must have made it tough for you to focus on the game." Will says, matter of factly.
"As luck would have it? I didn't have to. We won by forfeit. New Market's Coach got caught up in some big scandal. Only half the team showed up to play." I respond.
"Holy fuck, I remember that! It was in the news for a week." Will says, as his face shows a flash of remembering.
"Yeah, well it was East Aversville's first championship. We were so excited. I even wrote off Ava's absence, after all, she didn't actually miss a game. Mom and dad went to help the coaches plan a championship party. I went home to... change."
"Bullshit! You went home to find your sister and tell her the news." Will calls me out.
"Maybe." I respond. "But when I got home, there was an unfamiliar car in the driveway."
"I see where this is going..." Will says, apprehensively.
"When I walked in the house, the whole place reeked of Tomahawk body spray. I'd gotten sick of that scent the past few days. It stuck to Avalon after school. It wasn't surprising that her door was shut. I almost opened it."
"Probably for the best you didn't" Will says, his eyes giving me a compassionate look.
"Actually... It's taken a long time for me to forgive myself for not at least knocking."
Aversville, Tuolovi
Six years ago
"Ahh feels good to get out of that uniform. I'll just hang out until Jaden's gone. Then I can tell Ava the news and we can go to the party" I muttered to myself.
As I fired up my computer, something came through the other side of my wall. Muffled giggling. That turned into laughter.
"Ugh, sounds like things are heating up in there. This is just... awkward." I muttered.
I paced around my room, trying to get my mind off it.
"This sucks. I don't want to hear this, but I also can't turn on the TV or they'll know I'm home. We might be fighting but I don't want to embarrass her with a guy." I muttered as I stared at the ceiling. My guts clenched at the thought though.
"Fuck I feel like I just got gutpunched." I mutter. That's when the audible thumping kicked off.
"Is she...? How could she..? Why do I care? What the fuck is wrong with me?" I whispered to myself, as the thumping started to get a rhythm.
"I... I gotta get out of here" I whispered to myself as I pulled a pillow over my head.
Then I heard glass break.
"AVA!" I screamed, at the top of my lungs.
I rushed into the hallway just quickly enough to see Jaden emerging from my Ava's room. I stared at him as he walked out.
"'Sup. How was the game?"
"The game?"
"Uh yeah.. well don't take it too hard. Can't win 'em all." Jaden smirked at me before walking out the door.
"Why him sis, of all the guys..." I muttered to myself.
I turned around and forced myself to look at Ava. She recoiled at the accusation in my glare.
"Andy I'm... I..."
"Save it... None of my business if you want to be a slam piece for that piece of shit." I said, with venom in my voice.
Ava started sobbing.
"Regional champs, by the way. Figured I'd let you know, since... you had someplace more important to be. Catch ya later, 'sis. I'll let mom and dad know you're busy." I said, my words full of hurt and venom.
"Andy, listen!... ANDY, WAIT!!!" my door had already slammed shut.
I slumped to the ground, against my door, and sobbed. Sobbed and sobbed.
Old Willy's Pub
Present day
"Were you upset because of what happened, or because who it happened with?" Will asks, his eyes full of caring and compassion.
"Let me finish, and you can decide."
"There's more?" Will asks, shocked.
"Oh yeah. The championship party was a blur. Mom and dad could see I had just shut down. Paul tried to get me to talk about it, but this wasn't my secret to tell."
"Given how she reacted when you took the Anna thing into your own hands... I'm gonna say you probably made the right call there."
"I thought so too, at the time anyway. The next two weeks were crazy. Wrapping up finals, graduation rehearsal, university acceptance..." I say longingly.
"Wait you got accepted?" Will asks, surprised again.
"Yep, full ride football scholarship to Vreysterburg. And I was an adult so I had access to my trust fund. I could have used that to go anywhere I wanted, really."
"So where did you end up going?" Will asks, anticipation in his voice.
"I'll need another Tuolovi before answering that." I tell him, not a hint of joking in my face.
He quickly fills me another glass.
"Mom and dad assumed I was going to play uni football. I had already decided that I'd take the year off, though. My plan was to winter over in Oulea as a ski and snowboard instructor. I just knew I needed to get away from home and clear my head." I tell him, every word genuine.
"What ended up happening with Ava and that punk?" Will asks before realising he'd come off as insensitive "I mean, besides the obvious."
"I ended up only seeing Ava one time after that. At the graduation party. She did come home beforehand to pick up her dress and shower. My guess is, she was staying with Mads."
"How do you know she wasn't staying with Jaden?" Will asks, intrigued.
"Excellent question, Will! This is really the answer you've been looking for since I sat down." I tell him, regret beginning to creep back into my voice.
"Fucking hell Andy, out with it already!" Will says, impatiently.
"While she was showering, I waited in her room for her to finish. I didn't know how to deal with how I felt after Jaden left. Between that and the things I'd read in her diary, it was time for us to talk."
Aversville, Tuolovi
Six years ago
"I'll just wait here for her to finish." I said to myself quietly, sitting at the end of her bed.
"Fuck, I'm nervous, the fuck am I even gonna say? 'Hey we haven't talked in a while, whatcha been up to?' Fuck no! 'What are you doing step sis?' Gah! that's terrible, and fucked up." her phone buzzed. "'I'm sorry Ava, I don't know what was going on in my head, can we talk about it before the party?' That could work..." My thoughts were once again interrupted by her buzzing phone.
"Shit shit shit it's like the diary all over again. She's going to kill me if she catches me snooping... please let it be leg shaving day." I muttered as I picked up the phone.
"Your birthday as your passcode? Tsk tsk. God damn it Ava we're going to have to talk about safety after. Let's see who's blowing up your phone. Hooly shit that is a wall of text." I muttered to myself again.
"Jaden, of course."
"Hey...
We need 2 talk
Ava talk 2 me
Come on Ava
Ava WTF let's be adults"
"FUCK OFF JADEN
I SAID STOP AND U KEPT PUSHING! I thought u were going to rape me."
"Don't be dramatic UR overreacting"
"THE FUCK I AM NO MEANS NO"
"U led me on and then u went all cold on me"
"U ripped my shirt! Wud u have stopped if u didn't hear my bro come home Doubt..."
"Yeah cuz gym muscles scare me."
"You fucking piece of shit. You are a dead man walking. I am about to rip your fucking guts out you scum." I muttered to myself as I kept going.
"Enuff about him come out front in 10 and we'll talk this out."
"NO WAY i'm getting in a car with u after that."
"1 more chance. pls?"
"It's not just what u did. I wasn't feeling it with u"
"U were, u just won't admit it 2 urself. Give me another chance to prove it."
"I don't think there's anything u can say to fix this its not all about u"
My blood continued to boil. "FUCK YOU, You are way past that you date raping fuck." I muttered to myself, perhaps a little too loud.
"WDYM"
"Its personal and its complicated. I need some space."
"Let's talk at the party 2nite. Lots of ppl around. You owe me that much at least"
"She doesn't owe you shit, you fucking prick."
"I owe u a kick in the balls for the last time I saw u"
"Pls? I leve if it gets awk"
"No promises. I'll hear u out but that's IT"
"TY Babe! CUL8ER 2nite!"
I momentarily saw red, and heard the sound of my heartbeat in my ears.
"The fuck you will!" I muttered glancing towards the living room.
I carefully replaced Ava's phone and left the room.
A few hours later...
"Hey there Andy!"
I stayed silent.
"Are you alright there, son?"
"Hey kid! We didn't think you were... uh oh..."
"ANDY! You made it, son... Buddy, what's wrong?"
I ignored everyone as I turned towards Ava, talking to Jaden in the corner of the room.
"Andy!"
All of their voices were like echoes.
"...I turned off into the drive-thru, and the dumbshit cop shot right past me..."
Mads' face alerted Jaden that something was off. He turned around to see me, fire burning in my eyes.
His face quickly twisted into the trademark smirk I'd grown to hate.
"Yo Andy... well I was almost right. I guess you didn't lose but you didn't really win either. Does a title really mean anything if you didn't actually beat anyone for it?"
"I'm not here to talk, Jaden." I responded, gritting my teeth. The sound of my own voice seemed distant and emotionless
"I'm here because of what you did to my sister."
Ava and Jaden exchanged bewildered looks.
"What are you talking about, son?" I heard my dad's voice from across the room.
"Jaden was here with Avalon when New Market forfeited." My response was a chilly monotone. My eyes never left Jaden.
"Andy stop! Let's talk about this..." I heard Ava's voice pleading with me.
As my parents looked at me expectantly, Ava's eyes begged for my silence.
"This scumbag tried to have his way with Avalon. She only barely fought him off."
"WHAT?" I heard my dad's voice from across the room again.
"Is it true, sweetie?" I heard my mom ask.
"He... I.. I don't know! I'm okay... I handled it."
"You handled it?" I heard dad's exasperated voice.
Jaden glanced around nervously.
"Look, we've already worked through this. I would never..."
Everything else he said was gone. My hands formed into fists which I raised to signal that the conversation was over.
"So it's gonna be like that... Now this is a party!" I heard Jaden say, before he sized me up.
"Welcome to the school of hard knocks, rich boy."
His left shoulder dipped slightly, telegraphing his opener. I ducked beneath it and put everything I had into one punch into his diaphragm. I quickly grabbed the back of his head, pulling his face into a vicious upward knee. The room echoed with the sickening thud of bone on bone. Jaden fell backwards at Ava's feet, struggling to stay conscious.
Paul glared down at him, face uncharacteristically grim.
"Get up. You're not welcome in our home, Jaden. You're lucky you got off with a beating, I should be calling the cops." he said.
"Call 'em! All of these people just witnessed your son assaulting me!" Jaden sneered back.
Paul's voice lowered to become cold and menacing: "What do you think a man of my resources would do to protect his family? Think long and hard about that before crossing our paths again."
"You'd better leave. Now." I heard Lucy's voice chime in.
After Jaden was escorted out, I turned to face my sister. I wasn't sure what to expect, but it wasn't the naked rage in her eyes.
"Ava, he..."
"STOP! Don't you say another fucking word!" Her voice seethed with bitterness and rising fury.
"So you thought you'd ride on in here and save the day, huh? Is that it? You called Jaden a scumbag yet he was the one letting me make my own decisions tonight."
"He almost..."
"I'M NOT DONE! Here's the thing... I've gotten really good at taking care of myself. You made sure of that."
"Sweetie, if Jaden did.. those things..." I heard my father's pleading voice.
"NO! You stay out of this dad! This is between me and him. You wanted a son so bad, you never bothered to ask me if I wanted a brother."
"And you! stay the fuck away from me, Andy! The further away, the better!" My heart skipped a beat as I saw the violence in her eyes.
She began punching me in the torso "I. DON'T NEED." before raising her fist to hit me in the face "Your..." she petered out when I caught her fist in my hand. After a few moments, the tension in her body was spent, and her arm relaxed. The fire faded in her eyes. She didn't resist as I gently lowered her arm. With a pained expression, I brought up my other hand to cradle her clenched fist, and then wordlessly I released it and turned to depart.
"Andy wait!" I heard my mother calling back to me. I cast an anguished glance at my mother as I strode towards the door.
Mads hesitated a moment before saying "I'll go after him, make sure he's alright."
Two hours later...
Ava's thoughts swirled: "Leave it to Andy to turn a party into a shitshow... Mom and dad didn't need to go after him. Mads' text said he was fine. But how did he find out what happened with Jaden to begin with? That boy is a mystery. Hot shower, take me away." she sighed. "I'm doing it again. Overreacting in hopes that nobody sees through me. Discovers my secret... Andy did exactly what I needed from him, and I'm punishing him for it. I'm running out of time. In a couple of months we'll be at different schools, and only see each other on special occasions. I can't leave things like this... I need to face whatever this is. I'll talk to him in the morning. If he feels the same way, maybe it's not too late. And if he doesn't... I can try to move on." The thoughts continued swirling, until she resolutely said "Tomorrow, we'll talk."
Early next Morning...
"I guess that's everything. Mads has plenty of time to rush me to Andre Spaceport before rush hour. My flight boards at 5:10AM." I quietly muttered, before sighing. "This is for the best, but mom and dad would never understand. Quiet now. If I wake them up, there'll be questions. I'll miss my window" I muttered as I quietly opened their bedroom door.
"God, they really love each other. Mom couldn't have found a better husband. Or a better father to me." my thoughts rose like a tsunami. "Goodbye mom and dad. I'll miss you. I love you so much." I quietly whispered. "Please forgive me for this..." I left an envelope on their dresser before leaving into the hallway. "Fuck this is hard.." I paused in front of Ava's door. Out of habit, my hand reached for the doorknob, but stopped short. I sighed. "I love you too sis. I always have. For you... I'll stay away," I took a deep breath, ragged with emotion, and then quietly, I slipped out of the house for the last time.
Old Willy's Pub
Present day
"No shit? You just dropped a note and left?" Will asks, shocked once again. "That's cold."
"I was eighteen so my trust fund was accessible. I knew if I stayed, I'd be at Vreysterburg in two months."
"You're leaving things out." Will said, suspiciously.
"Nothing... important. Anyway, I went to Oulea, did a winter of skiing and snowboarding instruction, before going into the Military Academy there. Trained to be a Stardancer pilot."
"No shit huh? Lucy and Paul wouldn't have taken this well."
"There were a few emotional phone calls but by the winter they were resigned to it. Ava never called, but I did get texts for a while. Angry at first, then pleading."
"Son, leaving like that was a shitty thing to do regardless. I was pretty much on Team Andy until now. You need to talk to Ava."
"About that... A week ago, she was assigned to my ship, the Ardent, as a new Stardancer Pilot."
"Whaaaat???"
