Minister of Defense: Malphe
Deputy Minister(s) of Defense: Lozinak, Zazumo
Deputy Minister(s) of Defense: Lozinak, Zazumo
The NPA is in the hands of a small rodent. Rest easy and peacefully.
The NPA began March quiet and sleepy, being still deployed in The Backbone of Fascism. People's rifles were used as cricket bats or clubs, depending on whether they picked beer or whiskey as their beverage of choice. After nine days of disappointment in the cold, snowy weather the order came through to return to HC Metalurg; those that didn't leave immediately were booted out unceremoniously by EPSA Officers, tired of their regular Flemingovian Mass keeping them awake at night. That and the constant loud bickering in the officer's lounge concerning highly sensitive subjects that nobody is treating as highly sensitive subjects.
No time was wasted, once the last of the Auxillary had arrived at the NPA's HQ, in getting the slowly sobering soldiers moving again. On the tenth a joint operation with the SPSF (South Pacific Special Forces) was conducted, the organization of which resembled a Raccoon and a Rat arguing about spreadsheets (mainly because it was a Raccoon and a Rat arguing about spreadsheets). In this operation there were three teams, the first of which was lead by NPA MoD Malphe and two others lead by SPSF soldiers; it was noted that the SPSF was detagging more targets than the NPA by far, hence Malphe began to adopt SPSF techniques in his own detagging operations at home. So far he's detagging about half as many per update, which he has decided is fantastic progress that he will not build upon because he can't be bothered detagging 30 targets in one sitting. Nosir.
On the next day Deropia- then NPA Sergeant- took his officer test and succeeded with flying colours. Quite literally flying colours in fact, Malphe had painted the tank shells rainbow because he thought it looked funny. Deropia, as per tradition (It was really twelve years old), was then promoted to the rank of Lieutenant because if the NPA Officers don't outnumber the NPA Soldiers, you're doing it wrong.
A little after that, on the thirteenth, an anti-fascist operation with the United Kingdom was undertaken; UK and TNP soldiers stormed the fascist region of Silverkeep in a heroic charge in which the UK point began smashing furniture in an enraged rage. The victorious soldiers then left before the founder realized that his favourite chair was in pieces, with hammer and sickles crudely carved onto the legs so we could collect extra salt after the operation ended.
On the sixteenth and seventeenth the NPA, now a little tired and sipping unreasonably expensive imported SPIT at their leisure, went about two training operations lead by new and fairly new officers Deropia and BMWSurfer. After these, now even more tired, the NPA was herded by their Rodent overlord into another joint detag operation with the SPSF, the organization of which was largely nonexistent. Nonetheless, the operation went smoothly and Malphe's team hit a few more targets than last time, now with a 100% success rate.
Malphe now, out of the kindness of his own heart and by no means because DST prevented him from attending minor updates, allowed the NPA a break from operations for five days before throwing them back into detagging by the twenty second. Now reinvigorated and contemplating getting drunk again, the NPA seemed entirely peaceful.
As it happened, higher in the ranks a raid on the fascist region The Great Fascist Legion was being planned; to cut a long story short, the entire operation was one big collision. The Red Fleet and the MT Army- both anti-fascist organizations- were pretending to be fascists in the region so they could get enough influence to refound it later on. TNP and Euro&Co saw this fascist region with supposedly 20 native fascist endorsements on the delegate and began planning to raid and hold it. Turns out that other Pacifics were thinking the exact same thing, on the exact same update.
It was noted by Malphe that there was going to be a collision, so still not knowing about the covert anti-fascist operation at work in the region, the two operations between the Pacifics and TNP&Co were merged into a bigger operation. The jump was successful, and only sometime afterwards did a group of burly ushanka wearing men inform the occupying forces that they just crashed an anti-fascist operation with another anti-fascist operation. They all ended up making up and living in peace and harmony, beating fascists over their heads with large sticks. Shortly afterwards Zazumo- longtime NPAer and good morning meister- was appointed as Malphe's second Deputy Minister of Defense.
After several days of rampant rum drinking and vainly waiting for border control powers, the order came through to withdraw from the Great Fascist Legion. The order came as a delight to many soldiers with the notable exception of Malphe, who wasn't much a fan of post OP paperwork. That post OP paperwork, do note, also includes writing this article. I give up. Operation over. We all lived happily ever after. Done. Now I'm getting some ice cream.
*Some time later*
What do you mean I have to write more because this issue of TNL has went over the deadline and more has happened crossing into April? Hell no, leave me alone responsibility.
11/03/2018 - Deropia promoted from Sergeant to Lieutenant.
13/03/2018 - Stoskavanya1 promoted from Private to Private First Class.
17/03/2018 - The South Falls is promoted from Private to Private First Class.
22/03/2018 - Darcania is promoted from Major to Colonel.
27/03/2018 - Zazumo appointed Deputy Minister of Defense.
31/03/2018 - Sergio86 promoted from Corporal to Sergeant.
02/04/2018 - Bobberino is promoted from Private to Private First Class.
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