Treize_Dreizehn
TNPer
The Word of The Thirteen:
Chapter One, Verse 1:
In the beginning there were like, stars and stuff. No earth to speak of. And the Thirteen looked down on their creation and were totally bummed cause there were no people. They began to shape the ether, which is absolutely a thing, and formed from it a planet. But the world was flawed, because they sold those bootleg DVD's that people make in theaters. So the Thirteen moved on. They shaped the ether and formed eleven more worlds. And all eleven were flawed. Some had no Starbucks, and some had too many. Some worlds had furries, but others had no funny hats.
When the Thirteen came upon the Thirteenth world they'd created, they spake amongst themselves,
"This world will be our home, flaws and all," Said the First.
"What, even if they have mosquitos?" asked the Third.
"Yes," Said the First.
"And Malaria?" Asked the Second.
"Yes," Said the First.
"Blimey" Said the fourth, who was trying to sound British or something.
"Indeed" Said the First.
And the Thirteen descended on the world. They took up residence in the hidden places of the world. Walking amongst us as equals, but never forgetting or losing their power.
And so it came to pass, that the Thirteenth took human form and walked amongst the people of Osiris.
And those mornings and nights were the four quadrillion seven-hundred and forty five trillionth day.
Chapter One, Verse Two:
And behold the bright light came forth from among the waters of the Nile, and from it came the original one, and behind him trailed the remaining twelve gods. And Treize Dreizehn, the Last of the Thirteen spake and said "Verily, tis hot and you art walking really fast man, can't you slow down or something?"
And r3naissanc3r the Third said unto them, "I knew it, mosquitos!"
And the Twelfth, Nierr sounded as thunder saying "Go down amongst the waters and watch out for the leeches,"
Finally the Seventh, Cormac Somerset uttered to the first, "Rest now, and regain your strength, cause if we keep this up Treize is going to pass out I think,"
And the First looked among his brothers, and was moved. And he sat down in the sand and began to ponder the wonders of Osiris. And the twelve began to walk amongst the reeds and find shade next to the river and conjured up all manner of spirits and spirits. And the spirits of our ancestors sat with the gods and drank of the spirits.
Zeorus the Fourth let the spirits move through him, and when the spirits were done, he took a leak in the river. And the spirits of our fathers tittered.
For this was the first day of the pilgrimage.
Chapter One, Verse Three:
And on the second day of the pilgrimage the Thirteen looked out over the waters. And they saw the people of a village in the distance, and Cormac the Seventh said to the First, "Is that thine city on the waters? Of your visions? The one with all the poop in the streets?"
R3n the Third said "Of course the poop is in the streets, where else would they dump it? In their houses?"
Treize Dreizehn spoke as well saying "I guess we could give them indoor plumbing, if we were really bothered,"
And the First took a moment to reflect, and Zeorus the Fourth offered, "It's pretty far away,"
"Well we ain't gonna get there by yapping," the First said with a start. He began to walk as the rest of the Thirteen gathered their belongings, and Nierr the Twelfth explained to the Spirits of Our Mothers that he had to go, but he would totally call them later.
Chapter One, Verse Four:
And the sun god Ra came upon the Thirteen as they made their way towards the village, and he said unto them, "Woah, What uh, what're you guys up to?"
And the Lord of All Chaos, The Thirteenth Treize Dreizehn spake before the others saying "Oh, we're going towards that town over there. It looks pretty cool,"
"Verily tis bitchin', but this is my domain, and thou art trespassing on my lands," And the sun god raised his hands in anger, before the Thirteenth pulled out a blunt and passed it to Ra.
"That's the good shit man. You got a light or... well of course you do, haha," And the thirteen walked together towards the town, while Ra flew higher and higher into the clouds, until he took his rightful place in the sky.
"Did you just get the Sun God high?" the voice of Severisen the Second shook the ground softly as he spoke.
"Yeah," Abacathea the Eleventh said, kneeling down in the sand, "At least it got a little cooler,"
"Indeed," Joshua the Fifth said shortly, before turning to Treize, "Do you have another one of those?"
"Verily," Treize said, before taking a seat himself next to Abacathea the Eleventh, "This seems like a good place to rest."
And that was the second day of the Pilgrimage.
Chapter 1, Verse Five.
"Awaken" the First One commanded.
"Shit," Said Abacathea the Eleventh, "Like, the sun just came up,"
"We must go, tonight we shall arrive in yonder city,"
R3n the Third stopped suddenly, "Seriously? Yonder? Who talks like that?" and verily was true, no one has ever hence spake words with such arcane origins."
Indeed, the First One led the Thirteen into the wilderness, and to the gates of the city.
"Verily I say unto you," Commanded Cormac Somerset the Seventh, "Open the door bitches!"
And the city was silent. For they had watched the approach of the Thirteen, and had gazed in horror as the Thirteen, through the very act of walking through it, destroyed a small town on the outskirts of the city. Which I totally forgot to mention man.
Zeorus the Fourth placed his hand on the wall of the city with a start, and a piece as large as a man dissolved into his hand, "Knock Knock."
And the people were afraid.
And the day and the terrible terrible night were the third day of the Pilgrimage.
Chapter One, Verse 1:
In the beginning there were like, stars and stuff. No earth to speak of. And the Thirteen looked down on their creation and were totally bummed cause there were no people. They began to shape the ether, which is absolutely a thing, and formed from it a planet. But the world was flawed, because they sold those bootleg DVD's that people make in theaters. So the Thirteen moved on. They shaped the ether and formed eleven more worlds. And all eleven were flawed. Some had no Starbucks, and some had too many. Some worlds had furries, but others had no funny hats.
When the Thirteen came upon the Thirteenth world they'd created, they spake amongst themselves,
"This world will be our home, flaws and all," Said the First.
"What, even if they have mosquitos?" asked the Third.
"Yes," Said the First.
"And Malaria?" Asked the Second.
"Yes," Said the First.
"Blimey" Said the fourth, who was trying to sound British or something.
"Indeed" Said the First.
And the Thirteen descended on the world. They took up residence in the hidden places of the world. Walking amongst us as equals, but never forgetting or losing their power.
And so it came to pass, that the Thirteenth took human form and walked amongst the people of Osiris.
And those mornings and nights were the four quadrillion seven-hundred and forty five trillionth day.
Chapter One, Verse Two:
And behold the bright light came forth from among the waters of the Nile, and from it came the original one, and behind him trailed the remaining twelve gods. And Treize Dreizehn, the Last of the Thirteen spake and said "Verily, tis hot and you art walking really fast man, can't you slow down or something?"
And r3naissanc3r the Third said unto them, "I knew it, mosquitos!"
And the Twelfth, Nierr sounded as thunder saying "Go down amongst the waters and watch out for the leeches,"
Finally the Seventh, Cormac Somerset uttered to the first, "Rest now, and regain your strength, cause if we keep this up Treize is going to pass out I think,"
And the First looked among his brothers, and was moved. And he sat down in the sand and began to ponder the wonders of Osiris. And the twelve began to walk amongst the reeds and find shade next to the river and conjured up all manner of spirits and spirits. And the spirits of our ancestors sat with the gods and drank of the spirits.
Zeorus the Fourth let the spirits move through him, and when the spirits were done, he took a leak in the river. And the spirits of our fathers tittered.
For this was the first day of the pilgrimage.
Chapter One, Verse Three:
And on the second day of the pilgrimage the Thirteen looked out over the waters. And they saw the people of a village in the distance, and Cormac the Seventh said to the First, "Is that thine city on the waters? Of your visions? The one with all the poop in the streets?"
R3n the Third said "Of course the poop is in the streets, where else would they dump it? In their houses?"
Treize Dreizehn spoke as well saying "I guess we could give them indoor plumbing, if we were really bothered,"
And the First took a moment to reflect, and Zeorus the Fourth offered, "It's pretty far away,"
"Well we ain't gonna get there by yapping," the First said with a start. He began to walk as the rest of the Thirteen gathered their belongings, and Nierr the Twelfth explained to the Spirits of Our Mothers that he had to go, but he would totally call them later.
Chapter One, Verse Four:
And the sun god Ra came upon the Thirteen as they made their way towards the village, and he said unto them, "Woah, What uh, what're you guys up to?"
And the Lord of All Chaos, The Thirteenth Treize Dreizehn spake before the others saying "Oh, we're going towards that town over there. It looks pretty cool,"
"Verily tis bitchin', but this is my domain, and thou art trespassing on my lands," And the sun god raised his hands in anger, before the Thirteenth pulled out a blunt and passed it to Ra.
"That's the good shit man. You got a light or... well of course you do, haha," And the thirteen walked together towards the town, while Ra flew higher and higher into the clouds, until he took his rightful place in the sky.
"Did you just get the Sun God high?" the voice of Severisen the Second shook the ground softly as he spoke.
"Yeah," Abacathea the Eleventh said, kneeling down in the sand, "At least it got a little cooler,"
"Indeed," Joshua the Fifth said shortly, before turning to Treize, "Do you have another one of those?"
"Verily," Treize said, before taking a seat himself next to Abacathea the Eleventh, "This seems like a good place to rest."
And that was the second day of the Pilgrimage.
Chapter 1, Verse Five.
"Awaken" the First One commanded.
"Shit," Said Abacathea the Eleventh, "Like, the sun just came up,"
"We must go, tonight we shall arrive in yonder city,"
R3n the Third stopped suddenly, "Seriously? Yonder? Who talks like that?" and verily was true, no one has ever hence spake words with such arcane origins."
Indeed, the First One led the Thirteen into the wilderness, and to the gates of the city.
"Verily I say unto you," Commanded Cormac Somerset the Seventh, "Open the door bitches!"
And the city was silent. For they had watched the approach of the Thirteen, and had gazed in horror as the Thirteen, through the very act of walking through it, destroyed a small town on the outskirts of the city. Which I totally forgot to mention man.
Zeorus the Fourth placed his hand on the wall of the city with a start, and a piece as large as a man dissolved into his hand, "Knock Knock."
And the people were afraid.
And the day and the terrible terrible night were the third day of the Pilgrimage.
