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Describe the Person Above You

^ has the wrong topic methinks...although I would love to learn the violin, it'd probably sound like I was castrating a drowning cat.
 
I would comply with the constraints and rules of this thread, however there is no one above me. I am the pinnacle of humanity, the shining beacon to which thousands, nay, millions worship and wish they could attain such lofty status.
 
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