depeterson61
TNPer
Centre Royal, Wasebukhosini, New North Aqmuland
2100 hours
The king sat at his chair at the head of the Assembly, rubbing his temples. His nation was growing, and growing very rapidly at that. They had collected the names of over a billion people last year for the census, and this was only putting additional stress on Etrien.
He sighed, standing up. He was about to do something drastic.
"May I have your attention, please?"
Gradually, the assembly, all 317 of them, from all corners of the nation, began to fall into place, returning to their seats and looking up at the king, with bated breath. They knew the king didn't speak unless there was something big going on.
"I want to get into contact with Juan del Pastel. Not a big deal at first, you may think. That's incorrect. I want to take over the nation. They are running a decent deficit a it is, and most of that debt is to us, so I think we have a bit of bargaining advantage."
He knew he could not stop, because he had their rapt attention, and he had to convince them now.
"Therefore, I call an immediate motion. I ask that the members of this assembly vote on immediate talks with the Juanian leaders. If the motion is successful, we would move into diplomatic discussion with the leaders, and should those work for some sort of cessation, all the better for us. If that is not the case, though, I am not afraid to send some of our military."
He paused for a quick breath, looking around the room. Now or never.
"I motion to suspend debate on this subject and move immediately to a vote. This is an urgent issue."
The mediator stood.
"All in favor of a vote to suspend debate and move to a vote on the resolution at hand, hereafter known as resolution 2373?"
The king watched some hands go up, mostly in the southern districts. This was good.
As time was called after sixty seconds, and the hands in the air were counted, Etrien felt a sense of satisfaction. He had managed to convince the legislation to go straight to a vote, meaning that a fair amount of the body supported the legislation. The southern half of the nation was showing strong support, which was good. They would be the ones who would be sending the men to conquer should that be necessary.
The mediator rose again, pushing his glasses up a little. He help up a sheet of paper, marking the votes.
"By a margin of 197-120, the motion passes. We now move to a vote. The process will be repeated. All those in favor?"
Hands rose, once again. Trying to do some quick mental math, the king began to smile. Maybe the whole population conundrum wouldn't be quite so much of a problem after all.
The mediator called for votes against, of which there were only a handful, and Etrien had to resist pumping his fist in celebration. This was lovely, better than he had ever imagined.
Finally, the abstentions. Among those who didn't sing the praises of either side were Denis Al-Suwaleed, but he was from Syrstardia. No surprise there. That war-torn hellhole had been dissolved by the UN themselves, a long time ago, after various extreme human rights abuses were discovered.
He figured Denis wouldn't really affect too many people, anyhow. He was from a northern district, meaning this decision didn't really affect him regardless. Etrien couldn't blame him, though. He had probably seen enough war and death for a thousand lifetimes.
The mediator rose again, calling for attention.
"With 243 votes for, 22 against, and 52 abstentions, this vote evidently passes. At this time, you are free to go, or resume your previous activities, should you prefer to do so."
Etrien sat down and began dialing. He was calling the chancellor of Juan del Pastel, and he began running through the words in his head.
We are unafraid to use military force... We want peace, there is no need for anyone to die... We believe that taking over your nation would be in the best interest of all the people...
He breathed deeply as the ringing went on for a minute, and then it abruptly stopped.
A gruff voice answered the call.
"'Lo?"
Etrien smiled and motioned a few of his advisors in silently. Good old Jack Weyandt. Grumpy old man, but was really a teddy bear. The king had hear that the old guy was great with kids. Maybe that's why he went into government, Etrien chuckled to himself.
"Hello, Jack. Etrien DeCzekuwike here."
"Oh, hello, Etrien. How are you?"
"I'm fine, Jack. A bit tired, but it comes with the job. You?"
"I could use a cup or four of coffee."
"That's not a half-bad idea. Thank you, kind sir."
"Mhm."
"Okay, Jack, we need to have a little chat. Your nation is struggling. I heard the market dropped fifty points again today, and your GDP has been shrinking, no? Things aren't pretty, but I think we can work together."
"What do you mean, 'work together'?"
"I want to absorb Juan del Pastel. Before you flip your shit, hear me out."
"I HAVE NO PLANS TO HEAR YOU OUT TONIGHT, YOU LITTLE-”
"Yes, you do. You're alone right now. Your wife is at your house right now, and the rest of your office checked out by 8:12, when your secretary finally left."
Etrien smiled. Now came the hammer.
"Your nation has been in the dumps. This is no simple recession, nor a depression. This is a catastrophe. Your population is shrinking by almost 7 percent a year, and GDP is going down by about that same amount. Your 'free' elections are nowhere near free. How much did Faragher get? 97 percent at the last poll? That' shot freedom, that's fear, to paraphrase a favorite quote of mine, and you need to learn the difference. Therefore, with all due respect, I am telling you firmly but honestly that I am prepared to send men to die for this nation. You cannot tell me that you are satisfied with how things are going, nor that people would be willing to fight on your side if you stuck with your 'democracy.'"
He needed that last push. Etrien thought of it at the last moment.
"Think of your grandkids. What are their names again?"
"Eliza, Maria, and Thomas."
"Okay, Jack. Do you want to be burdened by the knowledge that you could have given those kids a better future when you see them growing up, just another pawn for your despotic boss? Do you want to stand by, and let things boil over? Because that's where you are headed, my friend. We've been watching, you know. People are mad. International groups put the approval rating at 4 percent. 4! People would protest if they weren't so afraid of death or capture."
"I don't know, Etrien. I don't know if I can do that."
"That's the thing, Jack. You have to. You, right now, are the person that control the future of your 17 million compatriots. You are the one who has to make that final decision. I have done all I can, trying to convince you that absorption would eliminate your nation's debts, provide a stronger education system, and give the people a future to look forward to."
"I-"
"Hear me out, Jack. I know this is hard. I did the same thing with Wheatthin, I'm sure you remember. Right now, your nation is destined, like North Korea and Syrstardia, to be a place that people try not to emulate. I hear people say all the time, 'Don't be like Kim Jong-Un.' It's not because he was a rather chubby little terror, it's because he drove the country deeper into the annals of failed states. Don't do that, Jack. Don't drive your country down. Things explode under pressure, you know, and pressure increased the further you go down."
"You know what? Fine. Fine, you win. I'll do it. I'll present it to the government, with a plan for improvement of standards."
"That's a good man, Jack. I appreciate this, and you'll be coming on my staff as Secretary of the People. You're good with them, you know."
"Sounds like a plan, I suppose."
"It does. Shall I call you tomorrow, maybe an hour earlier than we did this little chat?"
"Of course."
"All right, Jack. You have my regards and my support."
"Good night, Etrien."
The king hung up the phone, looking at the twenty people crammed into the room, with an expressionless face, before nodding and letting his happiness show. The room broke into the applause that his ears had been craving to hear all day. He watched with happiness as the circular territory labeled Juan del Pastel was crossed over and had New North Aqmuland written over it, the familiar maroon and gold and blue coming back to him.
Things were fine. Now he just had to convince Jack to take his daughter for the weekend.
But that, that would be a much easier conversation to have.
2100 hours
The king sat at his chair at the head of the Assembly, rubbing his temples. His nation was growing, and growing very rapidly at that. They had collected the names of over a billion people last year for the census, and this was only putting additional stress on Etrien.
He sighed, standing up. He was about to do something drastic.
"May I have your attention, please?"
Gradually, the assembly, all 317 of them, from all corners of the nation, began to fall into place, returning to their seats and looking up at the king, with bated breath. They knew the king didn't speak unless there was something big going on.
"I want to get into contact with Juan del Pastel. Not a big deal at first, you may think. That's incorrect. I want to take over the nation. They are running a decent deficit a it is, and most of that debt is to us, so I think we have a bit of bargaining advantage."
He knew he could not stop, because he had their rapt attention, and he had to convince them now.
"Therefore, I call an immediate motion. I ask that the members of this assembly vote on immediate talks with the Juanian leaders. If the motion is successful, we would move into diplomatic discussion with the leaders, and should those work for some sort of cessation, all the better for us. If that is not the case, though, I am not afraid to send some of our military."
He paused for a quick breath, looking around the room. Now or never.
"I motion to suspend debate on this subject and move immediately to a vote. This is an urgent issue."
The mediator stood.
"All in favor of a vote to suspend debate and move to a vote on the resolution at hand, hereafter known as resolution 2373?"
The king watched some hands go up, mostly in the southern districts. This was good.
As time was called after sixty seconds, and the hands in the air were counted, Etrien felt a sense of satisfaction. He had managed to convince the legislation to go straight to a vote, meaning that a fair amount of the body supported the legislation. The southern half of the nation was showing strong support, which was good. They would be the ones who would be sending the men to conquer should that be necessary.
The mediator rose again, pushing his glasses up a little. He help up a sheet of paper, marking the votes.
"By a margin of 197-120, the motion passes. We now move to a vote. The process will be repeated. All those in favor?"
Hands rose, once again. Trying to do some quick mental math, the king began to smile. Maybe the whole population conundrum wouldn't be quite so much of a problem after all.
The mediator called for votes against, of which there were only a handful, and Etrien had to resist pumping his fist in celebration. This was lovely, better than he had ever imagined.
Finally, the abstentions. Among those who didn't sing the praises of either side were Denis Al-Suwaleed, but he was from Syrstardia. No surprise there. That war-torn hellhole had been dissolved by the UN themselves, a long time ago, after various extreme human rights abuses were discovered.
He figured Denis wouldn't really affect too many people, anyhow. He was from a northern district, meaning this decision didn't really affect him regardless. Etrien couldn't blame him, though. He had probably seen enough war and death for a thousand lifetimes.
The mediator rose again, calling for attention.
"With 243 votes for, 22 against, and 52 abstentions, this vote evidently passes. At this time, you are free to go, or resume your previous activities, should you prefer to do so."
Etrien sat down and began dialing. He was calling the chancellor of Juan del Pastel, and he began running through the words in his head.
We are unafraid to use military force... We want peace, there is no need for anyone to die... We believe that taking over your nation would be in the best interest of all the people...
He breathed deeply as the ringing went on for a minute, and then it abruptly stopped.
A gruff voice answered the call.
"'Lo?"
Etrien smiled and motioned a few of his advisors in silently. Good old Jack Weyandt. Grumpy old man, but was really a teddy bear. The king had hear that the old guy was great with kids. Maybe that's why he went into government, Etrien chuckled to himself.
"Hello, Jack. Etrien DeCzekuwike here."
"Oh, hello, Etrien. How are you?"
"I'm fine, Jack. A bit tired, but it comes with the job. You?"
"I could use a cup or four of coffee."
"That's not a half-bad idea. Thank you, kind sir."
"Mhm."
"Okay, Jack, we need to have a little chat. Your nation is struggling. I heard the market dropped fifty points again today, and your GDP has been shrinking, no? Things aren't pretty, but I think we can work together."
"What do you mean, 'work together'?"
"I want to absorb Juan del Pastel. Before you flip your shit, hear me out."
"I HAVE NO PLANS TO HEAR YOU OUT TONIGHT, YOU LITTLE-”
"Yes, you do. You're alone right now. Your wife is at your house right now, and the rest of your office checked out by 8:12, when your secretary finally left."
Etrien smiled. Now came the hammer.
"Your nation has been in the dumps. This is no simple recession, nor a depression. This is a catastrophe. Your population is shrinking by almost 7 percent a year, and GDP is going down by about that same amount. Your 'free' elections are nowhere near free. How much did Faragher get? 97 percent at the last poll? That' shot freedom, that's fear, to paraphrase a favorite quote of mine, and you need to learn the difference. Therefore, with all due respect, I am telling you firmly but honestly that I am prepared to send men to die for this nation. You cannot tell me that you are satisfied with how things are going, nor that people would be willing to fight on your side if you stuck with your 'democracy.'"
He needed that last push. Etrien thought of it at the last moment.
"Think of your grandkids. What are their names again?"
"Eliza, Maria, and Thomas."
"Okay, Jack. Do you want to be burdened by the knowledge that you could have given those kids a better future when you see them growing up, just another pawn for your despotic boss? Do you want to stand by, and let things boil over? Because that's where you are headed, my friend. We've been watching, you know. People are mad. International groups put the approval rating at 4 percent. 4! People would protest if they weren't so afraid of death or capture."
"I don't know, Etrien. I don't know if I can do that."
"That's the thing, Jack. You have to. You, right now, are the person that control the future of your 17 million compatriots. You are the one who has to make that final decision. I have done all I can, trying to convince you that absorption would eliminate your nation's debts, provide a stronger education system, and give the people a future to look forward to."
"I-"
"Hear me out, Jack. I know this is hard. I did the same thing with Wheatthin, I'm sure you remember. Right now, your nation is destined, like North Korea and Syrstardia, to be a place that people try not to emulate. I hear people say all the time, 'Don't be like Kim Jong-Un.' It's not because he was a rather chubby little terror, it's because he drove the country deeper into the annals of failed states. Don't do that, Jack. Don't drive your country down. Things explode under pressure, you know, and pressure increased the further you go down."
"You know what? Fine. Fine, you win. I'll do it. I'll present it to the government, with a plan for improvement of standards."
"That's a good man, Jack. I appreciate this, and you'll be coming on my staff as Secretary of the People. You're good with them, you know."
"Sounds like a plan, I suppose."
"It does. Shall I call you tomorrow, maybe an hour earlier than we did this little chat?"
"Of course."
"All right, Jack. You have my regards and my support."
"Good night, Etrien."
The king hung up the phone, looking at the twenty people crammed into the room, with an expressionless face, before nodding and letting his happiness show. The room broke into the applause that his ears had been craving to hear all day. He watched with happiness as the circular territory labeled Juan del Pastel was crossed over and had New North Aqmuland written over it, the familiar maroon and gold and blue coming back to him.
Things were fine. Now he just had to convince Jack to take his daughter for the weekend.
But that, that would be a much easier conversation to have.