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Nation in The North Pacific: Nordic-British Union Ministry you are interested in joining: Home Affairs Previous experience in this area of government: Absolutely nothing!

Well..yeah! We do special requests! Like that time I pried someone’s skull open… But that’s another story!

Yes, murder is bad! Although we may be partial towards…pre-coordinated assassinations, are we? Which reminds me, we have a special offer right now! For a mere 50 pounds, you too can sleep tight at night knowing any loose ends or doubts in your mind are well and truly…silenced. Permanently...

Bah! NS is down, so I can’t work on my little Factbooks that I secretly stick on Crom’s account and call it national canon. So here I am!

Present.

Present.

Present.

Oh really… Steaks or people, they’re all just as easily sliceable…

I have come! Aww…everyone ran away…

Yes, I do! I have been particularly fond of stabbing others over the years…

Wrong! The correct answer is: What is a Sterling Submachine Gun? But a nuclear bomb is also a weapon, so half points! Don’t you dare take my guns away from me this time, Cromwell…

I’ll make it out to be slightly below two minutes.

Oh, really? Let me have a g—

Me?! But why would I bust myself?

Grrr, my computer’s battery has utterly expired, and it’s eternally 0% and slow as heck! Jeez… Well, the good news is I’ll be here more often! No more art for me, though… : (

Present.

For.

Checkmate, flat-earthers

Hmpf! I just happened to choose a lovely place in England, and you’re nit-picking? Fine. I’ll say it. G-L-A-S-G-O-W Besides, Scotland and the dumb Scotsman I live with are one in the same. Complete financial dependence on the English.

Hmph! All wrong! Clearly Piccadilly was the capital of the United Kingdom, shame on you nerds!

The boat thing is actually another country as well! Something called Tasmania.

I, A27M Cromwell(NBU), do hereby solemnly swear that during my term as Gameside advocate, I will uphold the ideals of Democracy, Freedom, and Justice of The Region of The North Pacific. I will use the powers and rights granted to me through The North Pacific Constitution and Legal Code in a...

Present

And, I chose nothing. All my lovely pounds to myself. Nevermind that it’s all earned by someone else

Oh dear, littering… In that case, you wouldn’t like what weapon I used to seize the keycard…

Oh! You mean this extremely crucial keycard, that activates and controls the entire fleet, and destroying it results in the entire armada’s immediate self-scuttling? I have it here!

Nope, violence isn’t mandatory at all! It’s just a little side trait of mine, that you are all just another target… Have a great day!

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Oh, the great TNP fire! I remember that! Those nasty sparks formed a deadly pyre that engulfed that bakery! Definitely didn’t need a bit of coaxing from your lovely local arsonist… And @Tringapore totally didn’t help out with his amazing mind tricks that goaded those pesky firefighters into...