Dear SillyString: I'm redecorating my room, and I want my room color to really express my personality. How would I go about choosing the perfect shade of color so that I won't have to repaint it again for a while?
- Painterrific
This is a dilemma that afflicts so many of our viewers, so I'm glad you asked it!
The first step you must take is to bring yourself to a good psychologist. After all, before you can begin choosing a color that fits your personality, you must first determine whether you have DID (dissociative identity disorder) and if so, how many personalities you need to match for.
With a diagnosis in your hand, your next step should be to take one of the many online "What color is your personality" quizzes. Though they appear simple, or even trite, these quizzes are designed with exceeding scientificity and can definitively match you to the right color for you. If you do indeed have DID, be sure that each one of your identities takes the quiz independently.
Armed with your scientifically verifiable personalized colors, you now need to turn those colors into paint. If you have only one identity, or if the colors of your multiple identities are all relatively similar, this isn't too hard. Take their average, get yourself to a paint store, and let the smart paintmongers do their job. They'll decide where you fall on the glossy-matte stage, and they can also estimate exactly how much paint you'll need. Once they whip you up a batch, simply apply paint to walls. You're done! Enjoy your lovely new walls.
If, on the other hand, the colors your identities are diagnosed with are significantly different, the averaging method will not work. When this happens, it becomes necessary to come up with an alternate solution that allows each one to be happy. My best suggestion is to rig up some sort of filtered lighting that will alter your perception of wall color, and then test various different shades of paint under these different lights. That way, whoever you wake up as in the morning will be greeted with their own preference when they turn on the right light. Easy peasy!
Alternatively, if you enjoy certain hard substances, you may choose to doodle on your walls with markers while under their influence. This will surely show off your inner... personality... in a way that paint never can. Good luck!
Seriously silly,
SillyString
- Painterrific
This is a dilemma that afflicts so many of our viewers, so I'm glad you asked it!
The first step you must take is to bring yourself to a good psychologist. After all, before you can begin choosing a color that fits your personality, you must first determine whether you have DID (dissociative identity disorder) and if so, how many personalities you need to match for.
With a diagnosis in your hand, your next step should be to take one of the many online "What color is your personality" quizzes. Though they appear simple, or even trite, these quizzes are designed with exceeding scientificity and can definitively match you to the right color for you. If you do indeed have DID, be sure that each one of your identities takes the quiz independently.
Armed with your scientifically verifiable personalized colors, you now need to turn those colors into paint. If you have only one identity, or if the colors of your multiple identities are all relatively similar, this isn't too hard. Take their average, get yourself to a paint store, and let the smart paintmongers do their job. They'll decide where you fall on the glossy-matte stage, and they can also estimate exactly how much paint you'll need. Once they whip you up a batch, simply apply paint to walls. You're done! Enjoy your lovely new walls.
If, on the other hand, the colors your identities are diagnosed with are significantly different, the averaging method will not work. When this happens, it becomes necessary to come up with an alternate solution that allows each one to be happy. My best suggestion is to rig up some sort of filtered lighting that will alter your perception of wall color, and then test various different shades of paint under these different lights. That way, whoever you wake up as in the morning will be greeted with their own preference when they turn on the right light. Easy peasy!
Alternatively, if you enjoy certain hard substances, you may choose to doodle on your walls with markers while under their influence. This will surely show off your inner... personality... in a way that paint never can. Good luck!
Seriously silly,
SillyString